moose 57 Posted August 19, 2016 Report Share Posted August 19, 2016 As they say in the Guiness ads, "Brilliant!!" HELL EXPLAINED The following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry mid term, and an actual answer turned in by a student. The answer by this student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well : Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following: First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which is unlikely. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. There fore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct..... ...leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.' THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+. h.a.n.d. 11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MyLadiesDaddy Posted August 19, 2016 Report Share Posted August 19, 2016 That's the best one ever. ROTFLMBO 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gypsygirl11 Posted August 19, 2016 Report Share Posted August 19, 2016 Very creative, well written. Deserves an A+ 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shabibilicious Posted August 19, 2016 Report Share Posted August 19, 2016 Teresa have a sister? GO RV, then BV 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MyLadiesDaddy Posted August 19, 2016 Report Share Posted August 19, 2016 9 minutes ago, Gypsygirl11 said: Very creative, well written. Deserves an A+ Way to smart for todays college. Just now, Shabibilicious said: Teresa have a sister? GO RV, then BV You Bad Boy You! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SgtFuryUSCZ Posted August 19, 2016 Report Share Posted August 19, 2016 ***/// Very groovy, YerMOOSEness ! A+ from us, too ! . 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gypsygirl11 Posted August 19, 2016 Report Share Posted August 19, 2016 43 minutes ago, ladyGrace'sDaddy said: Way to smart for todays college. This kind of reminds me of something THUGS would do, doesn't it? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim1cor13 Posted August 19, 2016 Report Share Posted August 19, 2016 Good stuff moose, always healthy to laugh at the twisted ideas of religion. Hope you and your bride to be are doing well 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RodandStaff Posted August 20, 2016 Report Share Posted August 20, 2016 All I know is that if hell froze over then the Vikings might actually stand a chance this year! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moose 57 Posted August 20, 2016 Author Report Share Posted August 20, 2016 16 minutes ago, RodandStaff said: All I know is that if hell froze over then the Vikings might actually stand a chance this year! Ya, when pigs fly!!! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SnowGlobe7 Posted August 20, 2016 Report Share Posted August 20, 2016 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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