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Mother-in-laws

Tiffany23

By Tiffany23,
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Tiffany23 Newbie

Tiffany23

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A young man excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and is going to get married.

He says, "Just for fun, Ma, I'm going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry." The mother agrees.

The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while.

He then says, "Okay, Ma. Guess which one I'm going to marry."

She immediately replies, "The red-head in the middle."

Stunned, the young man says, "That's amazing, Ma. You're right. How did you know?"

"I don't like her," she says. :P

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bodeen Newbie

bodeen

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Hey My wife's a red head, but the reverse my mother in law don't like Italian's and my mom bless her soul she loved my wife!......38yrs tomorrow party time.......... :twothumbs: Thanks Tiff.

Happy Anniversary my friend.... 38 years and you get a :twothumbs::tiphat:

Blessings to you and your family.....

Bodeen

Forgot a +1 for ya

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BLEACHERMAN53 Newbie

BLEACHERMAN53

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Well Tiff, I hope this is ok to post since we are talking Red Heads! If not I'm sorry.

A blonde and a redhead met in a bar after work for a drink, and were watching the 6 O'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge.

The blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump, and the redhead replied, "I'll take that bet!" Anyway, sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead the $50.

The redhead said "I can't take this, you're my friend".

The blonde said "No. A bet's a bet".

So the redhead said "Listen, I have to admit, I saw this on the 5 O'clock news, so I can't take your money".

"Well, so did I", said the blonde, "but I never thought he'd jump again!"

:twothumbs:

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zul Newbie

zul

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Well Tiff, I hope this is ok to post since we are talking Red Heads! If not I'm sorry.

A blonde and a redhead met in a bar after work for a drink, and were watching the 6 O'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge.

The blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump, and the redhead replied, "I'll take that bet!" Anyway, sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead the $50.

The redhead said "I can't take this, you're my friend".

The blonde said "No. A bet's a bet".

So the redhead said "Listen, I have to admit, I saw this on the 5 O'clock news, so I can't take your money".

"Well, so did I", said the blonde, "but I never thought he'd jump again!"

:twothumbs:

:twothumbs::lol: :lol:

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caleb08 Newbie

caleb08

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This is true. My mother-in-law doesn't like me except when she is mad at her other daughter-in-law. She told my parents that my husband and I could get married because my family had money. Ha Ha my cousins had money not us. We have been married since 1976 :D .

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Tiffany23 Newbie

Tiffany23

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So, the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.

After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty!

One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice. She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. There is no way I could ever repay you."

"My darling," he replied, "I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek." :lol:

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caz1104 Newbie

caz1104

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A young man excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and is going to get married.

He says, "Just for fun, Ma, I'm going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry." The mother agrees.

The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while.

He then says, "Okay, Ma. Guess which one I'm going to marry."

She immediately replies, "The red-head in the middle."

Stunned, the young man says, "That's amazing, Ma. You're right. How did you know?"

"I don't like her," she says. :P

HA HA !!!!!! Excellent. Sadly it hits home with me..................................................................GO RV 2011 BABY!!!!!!!

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Tiffany23 Newbie

Tiffany23

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A woman was leaving a convenience store with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind.

Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a very mean looking dog on a leash. Behind that were 200 women walking single file.

The woman couldn't stand her curiosity.

She respectfully approached the woman walking the dog and said, "I am so sorry for your loss, and I know now is a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen a funeral procession like this. Whose funeral is it?"

The woman replied, "Well, that first hearse is for my husband."

"What happened to him?"

The woman replied, "My dog attacked and killed him."

She inquired further, "Well, who is in the second hearse?"

The woman answered, "My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my husband when the dog turned on her."

A poignant and thoughtful moment of silence passed between the two women.

"Can I borrow the dog?"

"Get in line." :blink:

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Kandi77 Newbie

Kandi77

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A young man excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and is going to get married.

He says, "Just for fun, Ma, I'm going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry." The mother agrees.

The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while.

He then says, "Okay, Ma. Guess which one I'm going to marry."

She immediately replies, "The red-head in the middle."

Stunned, the young man says, "That's amazing, Ma. You're right. How did you know?"

"I don't like her," she says. :P

My wife isn't a red-head, but this story could have been written about my mom... She begged me not to marry my wife, she said, "It will never work...She doesn't fit our family, she may be a Corvette, but there will be a Porsche out there for you." Good thing I'm a CORVETTE guy!!!!

Next month will be 12 yrs, and we are very happy, but we don't get along with my parents too much.

I do have to admit though, I have the best mother-in-law...not many guys can say that!!!

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BLEACHERMAN53 Newbie

BLEACHERMAN53

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One more for the mother-in-laws

Harry was travelling down a country road in his native Yorkshire, England when he saw a large group of people outside a farmhouse.

It was a cold January afternoon, so he stopped and asked Farmer Giles why such a large crowd of men was gathered there.

The farmer replied, 'Eddie's donkey kicked his mother-in-law and she died.'

'Well,' replied the man, 'She must have had a lot of friends.'

'Nope,' said Giles.' We all just want to buy his donkey.' :twothumbs:

AND

A pharmacist tells a customer, 'In order to buy arsenic you need a legal prescription. A picture of your mother-in-law just isn't enough.' :twothumbs:

My Mother in law don't even say hi when she calls she just says is Joan there, put her on the phone! :angry:

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BLEACHERMAN53 Newbie

BLEACHERMAN53

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Well I have 3 daughters, I have never interfered with their choice in men,That is their decission! :twocents:

Care for Your Mother-in-law

A man, his wife and his mother-in-law went on vacation to the Holy Land. While they were there, the mother-in-law passed away.

The undertaker told them, 'You can have her shipped home for £5,000, or you can bury her here in the Holy Land for £150.'

The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.

The undertaker asked, 'Why would you spend £5,000 to ship your mother-in-law home, when it would be wonderful to have her buried here and spend only £150?'

The man replied, 'a man died here 2,000 years ago, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance.'

:tiphat:

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Shinnidan Newbie

Shinnidan

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Shin...that reminds me of the one that goes like:

One of the mysteries of life is: how a guy that wasn't good enough to marry the daughter, ends up being the father of the smartest and best looking grandbaby in the world? :P

well, that one of my fears...the my "babies" will be having their own "babies"....I don't want so them having a hard life(like mine was) until they are really really ready for it, you know? :D they will eventually have their own babies, and they wont be my problem, but as their "mother"...my chief concern is my "babies"(them my girls). :D

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BLEACHERMAN53 Newbie

BLEACHERMAN53

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Care for Your Mother-in-law

A man, his wife and his mother-in-law went on vacation to the Holy Land. While they were there, the mother-in-law passed away.

The undertaker told them, 'You can have her shipped home for £5,000, or you can bury her here in the Holy Land for £150.'

The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.

The undertaker asked, 'Why would you spend £5,000 to ship your mother-in-law home, when it would be wonderful to have her buried here and spend only £150?'

The man replied, 'a man died here 2,000 years ago, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance.'

:)

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