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2000th Post Wins!

cisole

By cisole,
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cisole
cisole

Its contest time again! Ok, this one is going to be simple, it will also be fast paced! It’s going to be a battle of the posts! Rules: 1.) You cannot post back to back there must be at least one

BETTYBOOP
BETTYBOOP

We could have a post r.v. party in each others country and host it for the visitors.

umbertino
umbertino

Quote 2.) Keep it PG, we want everyone to be able to participate, refrain from strong sexual references, etc... End Quote you locked the other thread and you tell us this.... Why didn't you leave

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cisole Newbie

cisole

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MESSAGE FROM MACK0121

"If you would kindly let everyone know that I am having connectivity issues tonight. I can't get the pages to load all the way and that is preventing me from posting. If you wouldn't mind passing this along, its what I was going to say :)"

"Wow...that took a while to get caught up...well done, everyone! I'm just not sure what to make of the general tone of this thread now. It's so...clean. I'm hesitant to post anything for fear I might defile it...since I AM on wishwell's bad boy list B)

And yes, since a certain oft mentioned part of me IS three days ahead, I do in fact know who wins. Its quite a surprise. You'll love it! :D "

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BJinMontreal Newbie

BJinMontreal

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MESSAGE FROM MACK0121

"If you would kindly let everyone know that I am having connectivity issues tonight. I can't get the pages to load all the way and that is preventing me from posting. If you wouldn't mind passing this along, its what I was going to say :)"

"Wow...that took a while to get caught up...well done, everyone! I'm just not sure what to make of the general tone of this thread now. It's so...clean. I'm hesitant to post anything for fear I might defile it...since I AM on wishwell's bad boy list B)

And yes, since a certain oft mentioned part of me IS three days ahead, I do in fact know who wins. Its quite a surprise. You'll love it! :D "

Cisole ...

Tell him that part sticks out ... goes into the hole. :D:blink:

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BJinMontreal Newbie

BJinMontreal

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di,

I see You still lurking ... here are a few tidbits to ponder <if the Pig lets them stay .. that is>

Sex appeal is 50% what you've got and 50% what people think you've got.

Sex discriminates against the shy and the ugly.

Sex has no calories.

Sex is a three-letter word which needs some old-fashioned four-letter words to convey its full meaning.

Sex is dirty only if it's done right.

Sex is hereditary. f your parents never had it, chances are you won't either.

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BJinMontreal Newbie

BJinMontreal

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As Benny Hill once said:

"Did you ever notice that everyone in favor of birth control has already been born?"

I tried phone sex once, but the holes were too small.

Love this one BJ. Mack thinks the thread is too clean. Betty has deserted us. I guess it is up to us. Want me to drop my blouse?

*GULP* .. uh .. okay :drool:

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mcuman Newbie

mcuman

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di,

I see You still lurking ... here are a few tidbits to ponder <if the Pig lets them stay .. that is>

Sex appeal is 50% what you've got and 50% what people think you've got.

Sex discriminates against the shy and the ugly.

Sex has no calories.

Sex is a three-letter word which needs some old-fashioned four-letter words to convey its full meaning.

Sex is dirty only if it's done right.

Sex is hereditary. f your parents never had it, chances are you won't either.

Oh, that's not so bad. I was about to ask Piggy if he was feeling deflated because of what DT said earlier today about him flying around the room making sputtering sounds because someone had forcibly removed his plug...namely a certain pork chop. biggrin.gif

Edited by mcuman
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Danan Newbie

Danan

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MED SCHOOL

First-year students at Med School were receiving

their first anatomy class with a corpse. They all gathered

around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet.

The professor started the class by telling them, 'In medicine,

it is necessary to have 2 important qualities as a doctor.

The first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the human body.'

For example, the Professor pulled back the sheet,

stuck his finger in the butt of the corpse, withdrew it and stuck his finger

in his mouth. 'Go ahead and do the same thing,' he told his students.

The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes,

but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the butt

of the corpse and sucking on it.

When everyone had finished, the Professor looked at them

and told them, 'The second most important quality is observation.

I stuck in my middle finger and sucked on my index finger.

Now learn to pay attention.'

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bald1 Newbie

bald1

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Posted

A 70 year old man went to his doctor's office to get a sperm count. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring me back a sample tomorrow." The next day the 70 year old man reappears at the doctor's office and gives him the jar, which is as clean and empty as on - the previous day.

The doctor asked what happened and the man explains: "Well, doc, it's like this: First I tried with my right hand, but, nothing. Then I tried with-my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. She - tried with her right hand, with nothing. Then her left, but nothing. She - even tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with the teeth-out, and still nothing. We even called up the lady next door and-she tried with both hands and her mouth too, but nothing."

The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?" the old man replied, "yep, but no matter what we tried we couldn't get the DARN jar open!"

biggrin.gif

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