2000th Post Wins!

[mcuman]

The things women will do for the men they love ...

She you and Mack.

[Danan]

A recent study showed that the average husband only actually speaks to his wife about thirty-seven minutes each week.

Well, yeah, I can believe that, I mean just how long does it take to say "Uh-huh" or "Yes dear" or "I'm sorry" ?

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The Smiths were dining out when his wife noticed a familiar face at the bar.

"Honey," she said as she pointed the guy out, "That guy at the bar has been drinking like that since I left him seven years ago."

Her husband said, "That's silly, no one celebrates that much!"

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Our last fight was my fault. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"

I said, "Dust!"

Man Teases his ex-wife's new husband: So, dude how was the second-hand stuff?

New husband: Not bad. After the first 3 inches, she was brand new.

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Prof teaching muscle movement, asks a lady: Do you know what your ******* does when you have an orgasm?

Lady: Sure, he's at the office, working!

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The young couple were holding hands in the Nudist camp.

Guy: When I tell you I love you why do you always lower your eyes?

Girl answered shyly: To see if it's true

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Wife, stark naked, stands on her head in bed.

Husband: What the hell are you doing?

Wife: I figured if you can't get it up, you could surely drop it in.

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Edited September 24, 2011 by cisole

[Aces-n-Eights]

i hope you all can read this

[Danan]

She you and Mack.

She loves us all.

[bald1]

There once was this bar with a sign in its window. It read, anyone who can make my horse laugh will have all the drinks they want on the house. So this guy walks in and asks if he can give it a try. The bartender says sure.

The cowboy walks out there and whispers something in the horse's ear. The horse starts laughing hysterically. The guys walks in and the bartender gives him the drinks. The next night the same guy and the same thing happens.

The third night the sign is changed to making the horse cry. The guy goes out side and a few minutes later he comes back in and the horse is crying.

The bartender says 'o.k. you can have your drinks but first tell me what you did to make my horse laugh.'

The cowboy said, 'I told him my privates are bigger than his.'

'O.K. but how did you make him cry?'

The cowboy replied, 'I proved it to him.'

[cisole]

i hope you all can read this

[BJinMontreal]

....

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Ooohh .. You ARE a naughyt one .. You got edited !!!!

Edited September 24, 2011 by BJinMontreal

[mcuman]

i hope you all can read this

deckchair does dasturdly deed to dude by use of delta degrees?

[cisole]

deckchair does dasturdly deed to dude by use of delta degrees?

Yeah I hope im never in that situation

[BJinMontreal]

i hope you all can read this

Yeah .. 'cause a bucket of freezing cold water would have been much too humiliating ...

[Danan]

Sex n shopping have one thing in common: In both the cases, men start sweating in 15 minutes n women want to go on and on and on and on!

Ooohh .. You ARE a naught one .. You got edited !!!!

I had to go back and see what it was. I will try to clean it up.

[mcuman]

Yeah .. 'cause a bucket of freezing cold water would have been much too humiliating ...

I guess there's always the ole string trick

[BJinMontreal]

Sex n shopping have one thing in common: In both the cases, men start sweating in 15 minutes n women want to go on and on and on and on!

I had to go back and see what it was. I will try to clean it up.

I'm still waiting for the blouse to drop ...

[cisole]

I guess there's always the ole string trick

Ouch

[Danan]

Hey Cisole, does this work?

After great sex, she lies there stroking him gently.

He asks: Do you want more sex?

She says: No. Just admiring your privates. I used to have one just like it.

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[BJinMontreal]

I guess there's always the ole string trick

I'm afraid to ask .. but OK MC .. I'll bite ... pray tell ... what ole string trick?

[bald1]

Hey Cisole, does this work?

After great sex, she lies there stroking him gently.

He asks: Do you want more sex?

She says: No. Just admiring your privates. I used to have one just like it.

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Uh oh

[Danan]

I'm still waiting for the blouse to drop ...

Cisole would stop me and I would have my feelings hurt. He is quick.

[cisole]

Hey Cisole, does this work?

yeah thats better, was a good joke before but just over the line a bit

[Texas2step]

WHAT DO WOMEN FORGET AFTER 10 YEARS OF MARRIAGE?

...WELL, THEY CAN STILL BLOW A PAYCHECK!

[cisole]

I guess there's always the ole string trick

How'd you get the beans above the frank?!?!?!?!?

[BJinMontreal]

Sex is like a bridge game; if you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.

Sex is like a bridge game; if you have a good hand, no partner is needed.

[Danan]

yeah thats better, was a good joke before but just over the line a bit

Sorry wasn't paying attention. I will be good now. Very Very good.

[mcuman]

Ouch

Obviously, you've never heard that joke....it so cold you have to tie s a string on your.....something.....something....something about finding it later....or something.

[bald1]

A man, Bob, and his friend Joe went out hunting. This was Joe’s first time ever hunting, so he was following Bob’s lead.

Bob saw a small herd of deer and told Joe to stay in the exact spot he was and to be quiet!

After a few minutes, Bob heard a loud scream. He ran back and asked Joe what had happened.

Joe said "There was this snake and he slittered across my feet, but I never screamed.

Then there was this bear that came up to me and snarled, but I never screamed."

"So then what did make you scream," Bob asked, exasperated. "Well," Joe continued, "two squirells crawled up my pants and I overheard them say, "Should we take them home or eat ’em now?