Do you want to be alone when you die?

[Tiffany23]

Gandalf Knows!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T91u0cFNK6U

[grand pubah]

Gandalf Knows!

hahahaha.....

I be loving the Gandalf

[Shabibilicious]

I have been avoiding this thread like the plague. Not sure why......It's not particularly painful for me. Anyways, many years ago my Grandmother passed away. She had essentially raised me in my early years, as my parents worked tedious hours. She was a wonderful woman. She was a bartender by trade and raced powder puff race cars in her off time. How cool is that? I've been sippin Orange Crush and chompin Cheese Puffs at "The Bar" since I was 2. The powers that be would never allow that in this day and age. I figure I turned out alright. Anyhow, when I grew older and got my independence, army, marriage and eventually a family.....Grams and I grew apart.....not spiritually, just life happens. Well, in her 60's she had a stroke and lost all speech and eventually she needed round the clock care. We (mostly my mother) would get her gussied up, with her favorite costume jewelry and have her hair done and take her to town to carouse. She loved her gambling tickets and her Goebel's beer. When we would wheel her into the lodge, all stopped by for a hug or a bit of teasing. She touched many blue collar lives and some white collar ones, as well. Through all this, she still had no speech, and you could see the frustration in her face. Many years this went on. One day she had another stroke and the Grace of Our Savior restored Grams voice....her body, not so much. For most of a week, the family was able to catchup on old stories and some new ones with my Grandmother. It was the most beautiful thing. She asked for a Pepsi from my mother that night in the Hospital. With the can in both hands and the straw in her mouth....she passed, completely at peace.

[Nelg]

As for me, I am a person of deep faith in Christ ever since a life changing dramatic experience I had 32 years ago which I will not take the space to recount now.

I have been with the ill, sick, and dying many times over the years due to my involvement in ministry.

One clear thing has always stood out to me.

When it finally comes down to the end of your earthly existence, people often have a radical change of view of what truly matters. Our possessions, accomplishments, notoriety, experiences, ect.. all pale in view of loving family and friends. Of meaningful relationships.

I have seen many pass this life with sadness, bitterness, and regrets because of poor choices or a lack of effort in maintaining important relationships in their life. Estranged family members are remembered and grieved for. Broken relationships now become important. Disagreements and disappointments now seem insignificant in light of the value of a lost relationship.

Some had nobody there to show their care. Other times members were present but bitter and uncaring. There only out of duty.

I want to be surrounded especially by my children and grand kids, close family members, my wife if I precede her in death, and possibly my dearest friends. I want to make jokes, laugh, comfort them, express my love to them and feel theirs for me.

I want us to sing praises to my Savior together for His goodness and for intervening in my life so many years ago and showing me the love and mercy I did not deserve.

I want my funeral not to be a time of mourning but a time of rejoicing for the time I was given and the blessings I was shown. For the love I gave and the love I received.

GP getting misty...

Amen! So let it be. I have my funeral planned out with triumphant and victorious praise songs, prayers for evangelism and mission, and a party afterwards. My wife I pray will not be left. I am praying that she goes before me or that we go together. Saints have sorrow, but not like those without the Lord. It is sad to loose our loved ones and friends, but it is a joy for the one who has died or is dying. "What a day of rejoicing that will be!"

[rapidrex]

I believe no matter how many are in your room, you will die alone and you need no help. There is not much anyone can do to help you unless they stand on your air line or smother you with a pillow.

[bb2]

I think a more important question is will you die without God. Because if you die without God,you are alone. Know God, know peace. No God,No peace.

[Santanna]

I think I would want all my friends and family to be with me, but I wouldn't want them around to see me go. My aunt (basically my second mom) had cancer and took a turn for the worst... my uncle had to make the hardest decision anyone ever has to make. They took her off life support and we were all with her, it was the most traumatic thing I've been through! So I would want to spare my love ones the pain and die alone.

[jbutch]

nah cant be alone when i die , when i know its coming im going to invite everyone ive ever known or met in my life to my living wake .

im gonna smoke the biggest cigars drink as much jacks and glenfiddich as i want , smoke the fattest doobie with all my friends and hope death comes in the night,

because if it doesnt im gonna have one of the worst hangovers ever in my life lol , i want eveyone to have a good memory of me not wasting away in some hospital bed somewhere.

also tiff when i was your age we had the same outlook on life , we were a pretty crazy bunch , no u better make that wild bunch we also thought we would never get passed 30.....35

we were always fighting getting drunk , crazy stunts ive had hundreds of stitches nearly lost an arm 3 heart attacks and i triple bypass you wouldnt thimk so to look at me

but here i sit 49 in 4 days a little older and wiser while a few of my mates never made it past their 20s-30s i always thought i would have been one of them,you know what

im glad i wasnt nah i dont wanna b alone when i die.....................................butch

[fastarnie]

I won't die alone, but there will be no people around. I will be on a river in Alaska fishing. I will be taking a break to enjoy a quick nap before I go back to fishing. Take in a nap and never wake. I'll be in Gods country, only fitting. I'll be like the animal that crawls off to die, or the old indian that leaves his tribe.

[Nelg]

nah cant be alone when i die , when i know its coming im going to invite everyone ive ever known or met in my life to my living wake .

im gonna smoke the biggest cigars drink as much jacks and glenfiddich as i want , smoke the fattest doobie with all my friends and hope death comes in the night,

because if it doesnt im gonna have one of the worst hangovers ever in my life lol , i want eveyone to have a good memory of me not wasting away in some hospital bed somewhere.

also tiff when i was your age we had the same outlook on life , we were a pretty crazy bunch , no u better make that wild bunch we also thought we would never get passed 30.....35

we were always fighting getting drunk , crazy stunts ive had hundreds of stitches nearly lost an arm 3 heart attacks and i triple bypass you wouldnt thimk so to look at me

but here i sit 49 in 4 days a little older and wiser while a few of my mates never made it past their 20s-30s i always thought i would have been one of them,you know what

im glad i wasnt nah i dont wanna b alone when i die.....................................butch

Butch, it sounds like you are going to have the last party of your life. Personally I would not go in that direction. But you do bring up a point that we have not addressed in this string. It is a question which most of us have tried to answer. The following question is addressed to everyone.

Let's say that you are perfectly healthy. You have been privileged (or cursed) to see the date of your death and it is seven days from today. Not only did you find out the date of your death, but truly is a heaven and hell. What would you do with the remaining seven days of your life?

[Tiffany23]

Nelg, my friend...I appreciate your additional query...I think you know the answer better than most of us...we would seek to make peace with ourself and our fellow man. To leave this life at peace with those that we leave behind. To give them assurances that we loved them and what they meant to us. For those with belief, you would want to make peace with your maker.

Then I would pretty much do what Tim sings about...live life like I was dying.

[grand pubah]

It is a common misconception that somehow by not having our family with us when we die, not having a funeral, ect.. that we are sparing those we love additional pain, trouble, and grief.

I can tell you from all my years in dealing with the death of many people's family members that it simply does not work that way. Those left behind feel cheated, like they did not get a chance to say their last goodbyes, and that the chance to show their love and respect was taken away from them.

It is a helpful part of the grief and healing process for the living and adds even more regret and grief if this process is taken from them by the dying family member even if their intentions were good.

My mother died last year. She adamantly was against a funeral or any of the like because she did not want to put anyone to the trouble of the expense or time and travel to attend. She did not want her death to be any trouble at all for others.

In fact she made arrangements to donate her body to a medical science organization to take her body as soon as she died to be sure we would not have the expense of the cremation or burial and to try and guarantee their would not be a funeral.

What she didn't foresee was the disappointment to friends and family that her plans "to save people the trouble and expense" of her funeral caused. It denied them the opportunity to show their love and respect and help them work through their natural grieving process.

If a funeral is done properly it can be a time of comfort and warm memories to celebrate a person's life rather than a tear jerking mournful downer. That is of course if the person left behind warm memories and love.

A funeral is for the living and not the dead. If a funeral is done properly it can be a tremendous blessing and memorable experience.

GP