Why did the chicken cross the road ?

[tj3659]

Changing the serious pace of topics here, a friend just sent me this..got to love it...

Why did the chicken cross the road?

SARAH PALIN: The chicken crossed the road because gosh-darn it,

he's a

maverick!

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for

change!

The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he

recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all

the

chickens on the other side of the road.

Hillarious CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that

little

chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely

qualified to

ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets

the chance

it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about

me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the

road. We

just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or

not. The

chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground

here.

**** CHENEY: Where's my gun?

COLIN POWELL: To the left of the screen, you can clearly see the

satellite

image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken.

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I

am now

against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about

the

chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against

it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black

chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't

realize that

he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before

it goes

after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do

is help

him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current

problems

before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems,

which is why

he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the

chicken learn

from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm

going to give

this chicken a NEW CAR so that he can just drive across the road

and not

live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken,

but we

have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the

road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You

can see

it in his eyes and how he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken

was

going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my

eggs when

the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any

insider

info.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a

toad? Yes,

the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been

told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was ***! Can't you people see

the plain

truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends,

That

chicken is ***. And if you eat that chicken, you will become ***

too. I say

we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the

Liberal

media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other

side.'

That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as

simple as

that.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.

Somebody

told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will

be

listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart

warming story

of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to

accomplish

it's lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads

together,

in peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2010, which will not only

cross

roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and

balance your

checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2010.

This new

platform is much more stable and will never reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the

road move

beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

[Starlifter]

Love It!

Scratch with the Chickens or Fly with the Eagles

Flying!

Go RI and Onward and Upward!

[NotReallyTex]

:lol: I almost choked on my drink when I saw what Al Sharpton: said :lol:

[r2quit]

THANKS!!! finally a lighter side tonight. some of these people need to take a few days off and get away from there computers. LMAO!!!