I stole this from a friend who posted it on a different site. -429
 
Like many others, I have been asked what I did on my Submarine. This is the best response that I have ever seen and thought it was worth sharing.
On my submarine, we did some of the stuff we did. We didn’t do the other stuff we did because if we did do it, it was a secret. So we didn’t do it. Even though we did, but not really.
The medals my shipmates and I didn’t earn for doing what we didn’t do, we did receive, except we didn’t, because we never went where we were and weren’t there when we were, but we did the stuff we didn’t do while we weren’t there not doing it.
As far as what boat I was on, we didn’t go where we went and didn’t do what we did while not doing it.
So, the bottom line, we weren’t on a boat that I won’t mention, not doing what we did, where we weren’t…
I hope this clarifies things.

This Is Why Eating Healthy Is Hard (Time Travel Dietician)
 
 

It's funny... because it's true!  
Gavin McInnes: I Can No Longer Tell When Liberals Are Kidding
(LANGUAGE WARNING) Gavin McInnes confesses that the SJW left has become so deranged that he doesn't know whether their latest complaints are serious.
 
 
 

A Classic!   
Uploaded on Oct 4, 2009A man calling in late for work witnesses a car crash and the ensuing confrontation; he narrates the entire episode to his coworker's voice mail.
 
 

Gentlemen (and ladies), Start Your Engines!!!  NASCAR Season is upon us!  
Who's excited?  😜
 🏁   🚗💨