Would You Marry Again?

[Nadita]

I say yes!!! Getting tired of being single, just waiting until after RV so I can travel around the world and find someone I can spoil rotten!!!!!!!!!!

Ar you taking applications ? Lol

[Elixirbaby]

Oh the movie this thread would make.

[kosman]

I do not think I would get married again... my ex-wife still misses me... I have to be careful because her aim is getting better. I think next time I will just find a someone I hate and buy her a house.

Just kidding ... I am married to the same woman for 30 years, I do not think anyone else would put up with me. True Saints are far and few between. I am already blessed, the RV is really for her.

Everyone have a great day and hopefully are REALLY great day sometime soon.

K

[willy1der]

I do not think I would get married again... my ex-wife still misses me... I have to be careful because her aim is getting better. I think next time I will just find a someone I hate and buy her a house.

Just kidding ... I am married to the same woman for 30 years, I do not think anyone else would put up with me. True Saints are far and few between. I am already blessed, the RV is really for her.

Everyone have a great day and hopefully are REALLY great day sometime soon.

K

You had me going there! +1 to you.

[smee2]

I would marry Mr KK over & over again, but when the time comes for him to leave me behind (I keep telling him I'm going first, but he IS 10 years my senior) I will cherish our memories until we meet again. I'm married to my best friend & eternal companion, he can't be replaced.

KK

My husband and I had an agreement too ... I was to be the first to die. After all, I had been told from the time I was in my early twenties I wouldn't live another ten years. Early thirties won't live another five years. Early forties won't live to see fifty ... and so on. And here I am a "cantakerous ole fart" as it was put in another comment

Our agreement was made the way it was so that he would be the one to have to go through funeral arrangements, and probate and all the other stuff that one has to do. We both knew I would buckle and not be able to do it all. So, I was to go first and he would do the "final" things.

Then the little beggar went and crashed his plane on the side of a mountain. He was only flying from one town to another not that far away. Great weather when he took off. Just over a river up comes a swell of fog, the plane won't climb, he loses his bearing real fast and then ... crash. He got out of the plane, used his cel to call 911 and get search and rescue and the police on it, then he called me. We got to talk for two minutes. I told him I would meet him at the hospital.

Unfortunately the signal from the locator in the plane that goes off in case of an accident was misread or something. In any event the search and rescue team were sent to look for him nine miles from where he really was. He talked a helicopter to his location, they were right over him though they couldn't see him because of the fog, mixed with the smoke. Then suddenly they had to leave and go gas up. Rather than just go to the nearest airport, where my husband took off from, they went to their own airport much further away. They never got to find him again as by the time they were back in the area. His phone ran out of power when he was talking with the police. He thought his only injury was his broken leg and maybe a broken rib but it was a lot more than that.

Anyway, he died before me ... the rotten little ... well ... no ... I still love him anyway. You can't trust men. They say one thing and then do the other. hahahahahahaha But the years we had together were unforgetable, and I wouldn't want to forget them. We did not have children, and I think that actually brought us closer together. A lot of the things that parents do out of love for their children, those of us who have no children find we are giving that extra love and attention to each other.

You said you were married to your best friend and eternal companion and he cannot be replaced. You have what Neil and I had. And no, it cannot be replaced. To marry again after having that kind of love and friendship all in one person ... there is no way, just no way you could come up to that standard, no matter who it is. I think it is better to have the good memories. Of course if I found a cuddler who wasn't expecting anything else I would take it in a flash. Maybe someone who had lost his mate and just needed the closeness of another while watching a movie or some game or something.

We used to scorn the term "better half" each wanting to be the better, and used to term "other half" instead. But now that he is gone, I know he was the better half.

I salute you and your decision to live with the memories of a spouse you couldn't replace if you wanted to. Fiinal words, (finally) ... don't ever let him leave the house without telling him you love him. You never know when some day you won't have the chance.

Take care, and be happy.

smee2

p.s. Sorry to get so long winded and all but it just seemed to spill out of me. Maybe I needed to share this experience one more time. It has been just two years, and right after the two year "anniversary" of his passing I got very sick, went to hospital, and almost died. When Neil died I wished I had been with him and died too. I didn't want to be here. But I must be getting better now, because in hospital I found I didn't want to die then. This is the first time I have really thought of the details since then, and I found I could write them out and think about them without crying. Thanks for being my silent audience and letting me heal in your midst. Strange, isn't it?

[willy1der]

smee2

p.s. Sorry to get so long winded and all but it just seemed to spill out of me. Maybe I needed to share this experience one more time. It has been just two years, and right after the two year "anniversary" of his passing I got very sick, went to hospital, and almost died. When Neil died I wished I had been with him and died too. I didn't want to be here. But I must be getting better now, because in hospital I found I didn't want to die then. This is the first time I have really thought of the details since then, and I found I could write them out and think about them without crying. Thanks for being my silent audience and letting me heal in your midst. Strange, isn't it?

Smee2 I don't believe it's strange at all. Holding back will sometimes destroy a person. Writing it out and sharing helps the healing process out for you and I can say others will be helped out too. Thank you for sharing.

God bless you!

[TPSprayduster]

Not me, once this one ends no more for me.

[leanonme]

My experience?? Women change soon after the " I do" All the turn ons get permanently turned off. Staying single but connected would be my next move.

[429]

Tried twice...my picker is broken...still love the last one, though.

cs, I knew what you meant. It's all good.

As for me, well as a friend once said (and Joe's been married at least twice), "Love is blind. Marriage is an institution. Who wants to live in a blind institution?"

Answer for me is NO!

I've been married for 29 years this June. I can't imagine changing my life completely around for somebody else ever again.

Go RV!

[krome2ez]

Tried twice...my picker is broken...still love the last one, though.

I know what you mean.

1st anniversary of divorce coming up,

and sometimes I have some remorse.

But then she starts up with the same ole stuff and I'm ok again.

[DinarBot]

I wish I could ,but ,it's kinda hard to find guys that like dogz and its not all about them.I'm going to say no.

Why do Humans put themselves down. I bet you're beautiful.

[catmax]

I'm truly amazed at the honest out-pouring of some of the folks here and for lite joking. I use laughter as a defence mechanism to sometimes keep from crying. Life has always been about relationships to me. With God, myself, others and nature. It's the special relationships like marrage, children, family and friends that helps us get by. It has also always been about serving my Father here in this world and the life here after.

I had an older brother die in a drowing accident when I was 19 and just about 7 years ago lost my 15 year old son in a tragic accident. The relationship to my wife has been the one thing that has helped me make sense of this crazy world. We didn't just get married to have that piece of paper and legal commitment to each other. Marriage is a sign; a symbol. It as much for the world we live in to be a sign of our love and fidelity. It doesn't always; because we are not perfect "yet," but I think it's suposed to be a reflection of God's love for us and the possibilities of what true unconditional love can be like.

My real answer is never use the word never and always. I can only say I would have to wait and see what life holds and what my Father asks of me next.

Sorry about any misspellings or if I steped on anyones toes. There is as many answers to this as people on this form. And there all right.

[willy1der]

I'm truly amazed at the honest out-pouring of some of the folks here and for lite joking. I use laughter as a defence mechanism to sometimes keep from crying. Life has always been about relationships to me. With God, myself, others and nature. It's the special relationships like marrage, children, family and friends that helps us get by. It has also always been about serving my Father here in this world and the life here after.

I had an older brother die in a drowing accident when I was 19 and just about 7 years ago lost my 15 year old son in a tragic accident. The relationship to my wife has been the one thing that has helped me make sense of this crazy world. We didn't just get married to have that piece of paper and legal commitment to each other. Marriage is a sign; a symbol. It as much for the world we live in to be a sign of our love and fidelity. It doesn't always; because we are not perfect "yet," but I think it's suposed to be a reflection of God's love for us and the possibilities of what true unconditional love can be like.

My real answer is never use the word never and always. I can only say I would have to wait and see what life holds and what my Father asks of me next.

Sorry about any misspellings or if I steped on anyones toes. There is as many answers to this as people on this form. And there all right.

I agree with you catmax on marriage being a reflection of God's unconditional love. I believe that the joy, pain or whatever emotion we see or experience is only a glimpse of God's emotions when they are of the fruit of the spirit. I have a grandson that I am overwhelmed by his love for me and the joy that he brings into my life. There is nothing that he can do that would make me love him anymore than I already do. I believe that is how God is with us, He was all in from the beginning. I think people confuse God's favor with love, we grow in favor.

Sorry about your losses, I have three children and two grandsons and the thought of losing any of them is something that I can fathom at this time. I'm not sure how I would handle it and I hope I don't have to. What I mean by that is it is my prayer that we all live a prosperous long life before going home to be with the Lord and seeing I'm the oldest, I would prefer to go first.

Thanks for sharing.

[cslewis]

Ha ha.

Not just NO but 'ELL NO!!!

It took me four tries to get this right. Now way am I gonna roll the dice again.

My picker is broken, and so is my truster.

Unfortunately, but expectedly, the one usually follows the other.

[dinarella-X]

No I would not marry again. No one could replace him. I always say that I want to go first so that I won't have the pain of missing him. We have been married 33 great years.

[umbertino]

Oh the movie this thread would make.

Right.....

Quote

I asked her why and the first words out of her mouth was she was physically attracted to me. I told her I didn't believe it was God and she asked why, my response was: You are in the middle of a divorce, why do you think God is telling you anohter man is who you are to spend the rest of your life with, you made a vow with another man, yes he left you but you're still married. Next was that a physical attraction probably isn't God, not that it can't be but when your separated from your spouse it sounds to me like it's lust.

End Quote

Most if not all relationships start off with a physical attraction before opening up to a wider spectrum of feelings and sentiments between the two...As Love is usually a ( better if not too fast) discovery, an exploration.... At least here on Planet Earth.

[KiaKaha]

Thanks for sharing, smee. The one phrase used most often in our home is, and has always been, I love you.. recently amended to I love you more. We leave notes around the house to each other & the children all the time... Sometimes including the phrase never forget.

Catmax, we lost our 23 year old daughter 5 months ago to an impaired driver... Our hope is that she remembered how much we love her. Some day the pain will lessen, for now we try to focus on the love & good memories.

Love is a powerful thing, and the love, true, unselfish love between a man & woman, can get you thru anything... Including the death of a child or spouse.

KK

[Bumper64]

we lost our 23 year old daughter 5 months ago to an impaired driver... Our hope is that she remembered how much we love her.

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss!!

I am not sure I could handle the loss one of my daughters! I pray to God that he takes me before one of my children!

[Francie26]

I would marry again, as long as it is right. I had real love once before, so I know what it looks and feels like.

Jim and I were older when we met. Perhaps that explains why he was the only man to ever court me by telling me about the Mobius Strip, the Klein Bottle, and the Mandelbrot Theory, and I laughingly always said I fell for it. But he was a complex man, so he was also the only man to ever buy me my own motorcycle helmet and my own pool cue. And he always kept me laughing. Yet, his seriousness also surprised me at unexpected times. Once when we were walking across a parking lot to the grocery store, he said, "Frannie, I don't feel the same feelings for you that I felt for the other two women I loved. The love I felt for them made me feel jelly knees and a butterfly tummy, but I've never felt like that about you. For you it feels more like roots growing deeper and deeper inside me every day." That was the moment I first knew--"I can do this."

Jimmy loved my little 18-month-old granddaughter, and we used to call her and ask, 'Do you want to come to our house?" Her sweet, funny answer was always a very solomn "Yesh," so we would drive the hour and a half to her house to bring her home with us to spend the night or the weekend. Jim had a special love for Rachael, and she absolutely adored him. My daughter defined their relationship after Jim's death when she said that Rachael and Jim were from the same "soul family."

Toward the end, when Jimmy was dying of cancer, I realized the end was near, so I began sleeping on the sofa to be close to him. Near midnight of his last night, as we both lay in a deep darkness only slightly softened by a tiny nightlight in a far corner, I rose and tiptoed quietly to Jim's beside, leaned over and whispered, "Jim, I love you soooo, so very much." There was no answer, but he was so frail and weak that I expected none. Leaning over a second time, I said, "And I know you love me, too, don't you?" Again no answer, but again none was expected. I kissed him on the cheek, gently squeezed his hand, and then wandered back to the sofa where I lay wide awake in the near blackness surrounding our two souls. How many moments passed, I don't know, but then quietly drifting across the soft darkness, I heard his frail voice answer, "yesh." He had gathered the last of his failing energy, and using our baby granddaughter's little word to tell me he loved me, he uttered the last word he ever spoke.

Early the next morning, I was standing at his bedside holding his hand when he quietly, gently stepped through an unseen doorway into Forever.

JimBear brought laughter, love, and sheer fun to my life, and I will always treasure the brief time we shared. Altogether, from the day we met until the day he died, we only had two years, one month, and 11 days, but it changed not only my life, but me personally. I have been forever changed by knowing how love truly feels, and by knowing I once had it. I don't expect to ever replicate that exact relationship with someone else, but two people can always bring their own special qualities to make a relationship great when love and laughter are parts of the equation.

It's been 12 years since Jim was with me, so if I am very fortunate, indeed, I may someday find love again. I would like that. But if it doesn't happen, I will always know that I am beyond fortunate to have had such a wonderful relationship even once. Many people live their entire lives without ever sharing that. I almost did.

[umbertino]

Quote

The one phrase used most often in our home is, and has always been, I love you.. recently amended to I love you more.

End Quote

Sweet.

Quote

Catmax, we lost our 23 year old daughter 5 months ago to an impaired driver... Our hope is that she remembered how much we love her. Some day the pain will lessen, for now we try to focus on the love & good memories.

End Quote

I'm very sorry to learn that. I'm totally sure she knows and will always know and remember how much she was loved and keeps being loved.....

Edited February 16, 2012 by umbertino

[catmax]

Thanks for sharing, smee. The one phrase used most often in our home is, and has always been, I love you.. recently amended to I love you more. We leave notes around the house to each other & the children all the time... Sometimes including the phrase never forget.

Catmax, we lost our 23 year old daughter 5 months ago to an impaired driver... Our hope is that she remembered how much we love her. Some day the pain will lessen, for now we try to focus on the love & good memories.

Love is a powerful thing, and the love, true, unselfish love between a man & woman, can get you thru anything... Including the death of a child or spouse.

KK

KK I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I can't imagin what it must be like for you. Every time I think of my son the memories for that matter, even the good ones, The pain is still a level ten. Seven years latter, the pain doesn't last 24 hours a day anymore, but it still comes up at some point in the day. You find different was to coop and there isn't one right or wrong way to deal with the death of a child. Just keep yourself surrounded with Love. People you love and that love you. Even things that you love to do or be arround. If I could have my son back I don't think I would want to take away heaven from him now that he has had a chance to experience it.

I was on a retreat and talking with the speaker about my separation anxiety from the death of my son. She was a saintly women an explained to me that I needed to work on being as happy as I could be. What are you talking about was my responce back. She said that our loved ones that have gone before us can only look down on us when we are happy or it would rob them of thier heaven.

KK, my prayer for you and those you love is peace and happiness. Draw them and even some of your DV family here close to you. You never have to go it alone nor should you.

Peace my brother

[Maggie123]

Oh Francie, Smee, KK, Catmax and all of you others Thank You for sharing such heartfelt messages.

I am one who even though I was once married, have not found "my true love" Yet... You give me some hope and motivation to experience that special kind of love in my life. Never give up, huh.

Hmmmmm... In Vegas when we all meet, us singles will know that any attractions will not be for our money because... we will All be RICH!!! Just thinking out loud...

Edited February 16, 2012 by Maggie123

[Francie26]

Oh Francie, Smee, KK, Catmax and all of you others Thank You for sharing such heartfelt messages.

I am one who even though I was once married, have not found "my true love" Yet... You give me some hope and motivation to experience that special kind of love in my life. Never give up, huh.

Hmmmmm... In Vegas when we all meet, us singles will know that any attractions will not be for our money because... we will All be RICH!!! Just thinking out loud...

In that way, nothing will have changed because any attraction I might find before the RV would certainly not be for my money either. haha

[cslewis]

In that way, nothing will have changed because any attraction I might find before the RV would certainly not be for my money either. haha

I'm in the same boat...gettin' harder to keep it afloat.

Is it too much to hope for both love and money?

[catmax]

There's nothing wrong with attraction. Even a male peacock struts it's stuff showing off it's feathers. That's how the female is attracted in the first place.