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Found 67 results

  1. We used to have a wonderful was to make you smile. We somehow lost that and Rod TOLD me I had to start another cause Fly Hi said so. SOOOOOOOOO Folks ..please post stores, fun pics and anything that has to do with nothing
  2. I stole this from a friend who posted it on a different site. -429 Like many others, I have been asked what I did on my Submarine. This is the best response that I have ever seen and thought it was worth sharing. On my submarine, we did some of the stuff we did. We didn’t do the other stuff we did because if we did do it, it was a secret. So we didn’t do it. Even though we did, but not really. The medals my shipmates and I didn’t earn for doing what we didn’t do, we did receive, except we didn’t, because we never went where we were and weren’t there when we were, but we did the stuff we didn’t do while we weren’t there not doing it. As far as what boat I was on, we didn’t go where we went and didn’t do what we did while not doing it. So, the bottom line, we weren’t on a boat that I won’t mention, not doing what we did, where we weren’t… I hope this clarifies things.
  3. This Is Why Eating Healthy Is Hard (Time Travel Dietician)
  4. It's funny... because it's true! Gavin McInnes: I Can No Longer Tell When Liberals Are Kidding (LANGUAGE WARNING) Gavin McInnes confesses that the SJW left has become so deranged that he doesn't know whether their latest complaints are serious.
  5. A fleeing Taliban fighter, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghan desert when he saw trees far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he hurried toward the oasis only to find a British soldier with a small stall. He was a Para selling regimental ties. The Taliban asked, "Do you have water?” The para replied, "There is no water, the well is dry. Would you like to buy a tie instead? They are only £5 sterling." The Taliban shouted, "You idiot infidel! I do not need an over-priced tie. I need water! I should kill you, but I must find water first!" "OK," said the Para, "It does not matter that you do not want to buy a tie and that you hate me. I will show you that I am bigger than that, and that I am a much better human being than you. If you continue over that hill to the east for about two miles, you will find our Officers Mess. It has all the ice cold water you need.. " Cursing him, the Taliban staggered away over the hill. Several hours later he staggered back, collapsed with dehydration & rasped... "They won't let me in without a bloody tie!
  6. A Classic! Uploaded on Oct 4, 2009A man calling in late for work witnesses a car crash and the ensuing confrontation; he narrates the entire episode to his coworker's voice mail.
  7. Gentlemen (and ladies), Start Your Engines!!! NASCAR Season is upon us! Who's excited? 😜 🏁 🚗💨
  8. From the album: Gun humor

    Because it is the only way I can share them!
  9. Trust me... Read it with a British accent! TRIGGER WARNING Meet ‘Generation Snowflake’ – the hysterical young women who can’t cope with being offended British thinktank boss says mollycoddled kids are breaking down in tears when asked to deal with controversial ideas BY JASPER HAMILL 9th June 2016 A top British thinker has claimed young women are in the grip of a “hysteria” which has made them unable to cope with being offended. Claire Fox, head of a thinktank called the Institute of Ideas, has penned a coruscating critique of “Generation Snowflake”, the name given to a growing group of youngsters who “believe it’s their right to be protected from anything they might find unpalatable”. ALAMY 4 She said British and American universities are dominated by cabals of young women who are dead set on banning anything they find remotely offensive. “It makes me sad that these teens and 20-somethings have become so fearful that they believe a dissenting opinion can pose such a serious threat,” Fox wrote in an article for Mail Online. This hyper-sensitivity has prompted the University of East Anglia to outlaw sombreros in a Mexican restaurant and caused the National Union of Student to ban clapping as “as it might trigger trauma”, asking youngsters to use “jazz hands” instead. 4 Is the sombrero really too racist to be worn in Britain? Books containing troublesome material are now slapped with “trigger warnings”, whilst universities and student unions are declared “safe spaces” where young people should not have to encounter anything they disagree with. Fox described astonishing scenes at an event set up to discuss whether the public outcry against footballer Ched Evans was “social justice or mob rule”. The academic said her mostly female audience broke down in tears after she “dared suggest (as eminent feminists have before me) that rape wasn’t necessarily the worst thing a woman could experience”. ALAMY 4 Fox added: “I expected robust discussion – not for them all to dissolve into outraged gasps of, ‘You can’t say that!’ “Their reaction shocked me. I take no pleasure in making teenagers cry, but it also brought home the contrast to previous generations of young people, who would have relished the chance to argue back. “It illustrated this generation’s almost belligerent sense of entitlement. They assume their emotional suffering takes precedence. Express a view they disagree with and you must immediately recant and apologise.” Generation Snowflake has also created a social minefield for young boys and men, who risk being labelled “sex pests” for twanging a girl’s bra at school, Fox continued. She said women were opting to stay at home and socialise on the internet due to overblown fears about predatory men. “There is a strand of self-absorption and fragility running through this generation; all too ready to cry ‘victim’ at the first hint of a situation they don’t like,” Fox concluded. “We need a younger generation that’s prepared to grow a backbone, go out into the world, take risks and make difficult decisions. Otherwise the future doesn’t bode well for any of us.” Will you join me in offending them? It's for their own good!
  10. Lack of hate crimes at all-time high Fhalkyn WASHINGTON, DC - This morning a protest was held on the steps of the Capitol, voicing disapproval of the fact that hate crimes against minorities, women, and homosexuals are so rare as to be nonexistent. The largely peaceful demonstration went on for several hours and dispersed after nobody paid much attention to them."This is a really traumatizing event for me," said one male participant who asked only to be identified as a woman. "My entire life, my identity, my very being is built around me being a member of a downtrodden and oppressed minority. If I'm not oppressed and downtrodden, then what am I? Nothing."Another woman participant, who asked only to be identified as an eighty-six-year-old male Hispanic preschooler, broke down crying. She wanted to know how she could pay off her student debt, which is currently sitting at around $106,000 for getting a degree in Transgender Studies. "I had my whole life planned out," she said between sobs. "I thought I'd sue some corporation for millions for not offering me a job - or if it gave me a job, I'd sue for discrimination. But every time I tried, my cases got thrown out of court for lack of evidence."Many had to be removed to their designated safe spaces to cope, with some staying there for up to three hours trying to come to terms with the fact that most Americans simply didn't care that the protesters thought they were special.Others decided to take a more proactive stance. "We can't let this culture of indifference stop us," said an older Caucasian woman, who identifies as a young black male of the Black Lives Matter movement. "If average Americans aren't going to commit hate crimes against us, then we have to commit the crimes against us ourselves and then use that in our campaign to make Americans care!" She then proceeded to cite several instances of hoaxes used to further their cause. When someone pointed out that all of those hoaxes were proven to be just that, she scoffed: "Well of course! The investigations themselves serve as proof that discrimination and phobias are rampant among Americans."In the course of the demonstration, the anti-hate protesters accosted several perplexed pedestrians, demanding to know why these passersby hated them so much. They were further confused by the apparent lack of hatred towards them, as the most common answer was, "Who are these people and why should I care what they think they are?" - See more at:
  11. ~ ~ ~ SATIRE ~ ~ ~ Republicans mentally rape Dem voters with Hildabeast scandals Red Square With more of Hillarious’s emails being exposed to the nation's mindset, certain previously suppressed memories begin to emerge out of the subconscious, causing us to doubt her ability to control our reality. We were not supposed to know or care about Hillarious's ties to Sid Blumenthal. It was for our own good that we didn't remember who this man was. We were all better off thinking and feeling only what Hillarious wanted us to think and feel. Now that the Republicans have ruined this blissful relationship, we begin to feel disturbed by unsolicited facts and unauthorized memories that lead us to question our trusted Democratic leaders. In what can only be described as mental breaking and entering, the Republicans brutally drag us outside of our safe spaces and repeatedly penetrate us with facts, inseminating us with unwanted ideas, and causing us to perform painful intellectual abortions. This effectively makes us victims of non-consensual mental rape. The harm becomes obvious already as we begin to wonder, how come Hillarious couldn't protect us from these traumatic facts? Has she lost touch and is no longer all-powerful, allowing the Republicans to send an information tsunami into our previously safe seas of controlled tranquility? Our sanity depends on knowing that all the faults, lies, and malevolence can only be found among the Republicans. All we want from our news sources is information about how the Republicans made our planet too hot by melting the glaciers out of capitalist greed and racist anger at minorities who live in extreme climates. Any attempts by the Republicans to disprove these beliefs automatically qualify them as climate deniers and mental rapists, thus reinforcing our emotional well-being. We know that the Republicans have made the world unsafe by exposing what really happened in Benghazi, instead of believing, like the rest of us, in the story about the offensive YouTube video. What difference does it make what really happened? If we could forget, we could live in peace. If the Republicans didn't prevent us from suppressing the memory of 9/11 and subsequent attacks on America, we would have continued to live in peace with the Muslim world. But the Republicans don't want peace, they want wars. We could have had peace with Iran if the Republicans didn't expose the discrepancies of the Iranian treaty. We could be free of fear of terrorist attacks if the Republicans didn't mention them all the time, exposing the religion of those who commit workplace violence. If the Republicans didn't expose the secrets about Bill Clinton’s affairs, Hillarious would not have been forced to cover them up and to attack the female victims. This, in turn, would not have weakened her position on women's issues and would not have immunized Donald Trump against her accusations of him being a sexist male chauvinist pig. If the Republicans didn't say the words "Radical Islam," there would be no al-Qaeda, Taliban, Boko Haram, Muslim Brotherhood, Hamas, Hezbollah, or ISIS. Syria would be a peaceful nation, Iran would not have developed the bomb, and Saudi Arabia would not have killed the Sheikh. We need a leader who will keep us safe in our comfort zones by controlling our reality and protecting us from traumatic memories. We need to continue to believe and question nothing. Is that so much to ask? Thank you for reading this non-pro-Hillarious article. -------------- Special thanks to Comrade Hammer and Loupe for additional reporting
  12. Enjoy! (You might want to turn the volume down just a little)
  13. Left leaning HBO, in their fanatic rush to destroy anything conservative, didn't think twice about a True Blood episode that saw republicans murdered en masse. The true bloods are vampires. The vampires are told they can't get into a Cruz fundraising event in Texas because only azzholes were invited. At the event, dressed as conservative Texans, the vamp woman says she has never seen anything more disgusting in her life,(maybe a reference to respect and politeness?), considering a vampire lives in a coffin, and tears human bodies to pieces when they don't just rip open a neck artery to suck live blood, I would think a real one has seen more "disgusting" than a mere mortal like myself could imagine. Aside from gratuitous sexual content, extreme profanity directed towards all republicans, and stomach turning special effects gore, HBO actually managed to make a statement that demands contemplation. Did they just admit democrats are nothing but blood sucking undead killers? Behold, from the ashes of zombieland, I give you; Ted Cruz Vampire and RINO Slayer!!!! rolmao... Happy Friday
  14. True story. Was stuck at an airport waiting to get home. Article taken from Sky News, Sydney, Australia. Enjoy...DM Man's Noisy Spider Battle Sparks Police Calls Officers are called to reports of a domestic violence incident, but instead find a sheepish man who was trying to kill a spider. 11:09, UK,Thursday 26 November 2015 A Brown Recluse spider. File pic Share on Twitter Share on Facebook Share on Google+ Share by emailAA man's noisy attempts to kill a spider caused his neighbours to call the police, reporting a suspected violent domestic incident. Officers in Sydney went to the address after numerous calls were made claiming a woman could be heard screaming hysterically and a man yelling "I'm going to kill you, you're dead. Die! Die!" After police attended the address in the northern suburb of Wollstonecraft and started banging on the door, a man who was out of breath and flushed in the face answered. In a post on the force's Facebook page, New South Wales police said officers then questioned the man about who was in the apartment with him. When he replied that he did not have a wife or girlfriend, police were perplexed. Below is their transcript of the conversation that followed: Police: We had a report of a domestic and a women screaming, where is she? Male: I don't know what you're talking about, I live alone. Police: Come on mate, people clearly heard you yelling you were going to kill her and furniture getting thrown around the unit. Police: Come on mate, what have you done to her? Male: It was a spider. Police: Sorry?? Male: It was a spider, a really big one!! Police: What about the woman screaming? Male: Yeah sorry that was me, I really, really hate spiders. What neighbours thought was a serious incidence of domestic violence was in fact the man chasing the arachnid around his home with a can of spider spray. The police report concluded: "After a very long pause, some laughter and a quick look in the unit to make sure there was no injured party (apart from the spider) we left."
  15. This Hilarious Story of Ted Nugent Visiting Muslim Bookstore is Going Viral Michael Cantrell Legendary rocker and outspoken conservative Ted Nugent is a man who isn’t afraid to speak his mind no matter who it might offend, and his wit is sharp as a tack. Ted shared a joke on Facebook about his experience walking into a Muslim bookstore, and it’s going viral. This made me laugh until the tears came rolling out of my eyeballs. Check it out… I don’t care who you are, that’s funny! I’m sure Trump would get a kick out of this wisecrack too.
  16. There is a place where fictional characters meet. Outside of time. Outside of all logic. This place is known as HELL'S CLUB
  17. Couldn't help it Sno... A teacher is explaining biology to her 3rd grade students. She says, "Human beings are the only animals that stutter." A little girl raises her hand. saying, "I had a kitty-cat who stuttered." The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could be, asked the girl to describe the incident. "Well,'' she began, "I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!" The teacher exclaimed, "That must've been scary" The little girl said, "It sure was. My kitty raised her back, went 'Sssss, Sssss, Sssss' and before she could say 'Sh*t,' the Rottweiler ate her!"
  18. A definition of globalization that I can understand : Question: What is the truest definition of Globalization? Answer: Princess Diana's death. Question: How come? Answer : An English Princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, riding in a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was drunk on Scottish whisky, (check the bottle before you change the spelling), followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles, treated by an American doctor using Brazilian medicines. This is sent to you by a Canadian, using American Bill Gates' technology, and you're probably reading this on your computer, that uses Taiwanese chips, and a Korean monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant, transported by Indian truck drivers, unloaded by Sicilian longshoremen, and trucked to you by Mexicans who are in the US illegally because the current president, educated in Indonesia refuses to enforce US immigration laws. That my friends is Globalization Question: What is the truest definition of Globalization? Answer: Princess Diana's death. Question: How come? Answer : An English Princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, riding in a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was drunk on Scottish whisky, (check the bottle before you change the spelling), followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles, treated by an American doctor using Brazilian medicines. This is sent to you by a Canadian, using American Bill Gates' technology, and you're probably reading this on your computer, that uses Taiwanese chips, and a Korean monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant, transported by Indian truck drivers, unloaded by Sicilian longshoremen, and trucked to you by Mexicans who are in the US illegally because the current president, educated in Indonesia refuses to enforce US immigration laws. That my friends is Globalization.
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