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If you can't be with the one you love -- Love the one you're with (even if it's just you) UNEEK HOPE YOU ARE HAVING A FANTASTIC DAY

Good Evening -- I have wondered from time to time why Zap / Poof has not been posted here - but guessed that he / they evidently was somehow put with all the other disliked / hated gurus -- I guess Poof was "out there" a little bit - lol -- but I really enjoyed reading his writings -- He had a distinct style and I enjoyed reading just for the pleasure of reading that unique style -- Zap is more on the light hearted side with his flying purple pigs -- I continue to read him and that is all - just read to stay up to date with what he is saying - I do not put any wagers on what he says - I do not make any decisions based on what he says -- I just read it -- like I would read the newspaper -- lol I have put myself out there on a limb again by bringing this mid week writing from Zap -- but hey wait just a minute before you jump the gun and brutally attack me please -- this one is different -- It does have some value to it -- at least in my opinion -- It makes sense - There is wisdom in these words - if you want to see it -- I just wanted to share a little something different tonight for your reading pleasure - there is plenty of sad depressing news -- too much in fact - As Always....... UNEEK ZAP Mid - Week: IN CONTINUATION OF LAST SUNDAY’S WRITING, THE PROCESSES ARE MOVING FORWARD WELL. ALREADY I HAVE RECEIVED MORE REPORTS OF THE BEGINNING FEW THAT HAVE BEEN PAID ON THEIR ASSETS TRANSACTED ON LAST YEAR. ALL THINGS CONSIDERED, THE UNIVERSE IS CONSPIRING TO GIVE US THE JOY AND PROSPERITY WRITTEN INTO THE PLAN LONG AGO. RIGHT NOW, THE ONLY SNIPPET OF INTEL OUT THERE IS THAT SOMETHING IS ABOUT TO OCCUR TOMORROW (THURSDAY) IN RESPECT TO THE GCR. OTHERWISE, ALL IS IN PRETTY GOOD BLACKOUT MODE AT THE MOMENT SO THAT’S ALL FOR THIS WEEK. NOT MUCH. JUST ANTICIPATION OF SOMETHING WONDERFUL ABOUT TO HAPPEN. SO, THIS WEEK, SINCE THERE IS LITTLE TO SPEAK TO, I DECIDED TO COMPILE A LOT OF GOOD STUFF TO SAY IN A LONG PARAGRAPH BECAUSE PAIN AND SUFFERING ARE INEVITABLE, BUT MISERY IS OPTIONAL. YOU HAVE TO MAKE THE BEST OUT OF LIFE AND WHAT YOU MAKE OUT OF IT…KINDA LIKE PLAY-DOH. OFTEN GREAT AND HELPFUL IDEAS CAN SIMPLY BE ONE THOUGHT THAT COMES AT THE RIGHT TIME AND TOUCHES THE HEART WHEN IT IS NEEDED MOST BECAUSE LIFE IS A PROCESS OF GETTING TO KNOW YOUR SELF. WHAT YOU LOVE IS WHAT YOU ARE HERE TO DO AND PEOPLE GET INTO TROUBLE NOT BECAUSE THEY WANT TOO MUCH BUT BECAUSE THEY SETTLE FOR TOO LITTLE. PUT INTO YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS WHAT YOU EXPECT TO TAKE OUT OF IT. EVERY HUMAN BEING IS A SELF ORGANIZING SYSTEM. SYSTEMS CAN BE CHANGED TO PRODUCE NEW AND BETTER RESULTS AND SINCE FORGIVING AND FORGETTING IS THE SAME PROCESS, START WITH FORGIVING YOURSELF. SO IF LIFE THROWS ROCKS AT YOU, DO NOT DESPAIR. THE BUBBLING BROOK WOULD LOSE ITS SONG IF YOU REMOVED THE ROCKS. NEVER CRY BECAUSE IT IS OVER, JUST SMILE THAT IT HAPPENED AS HAPPINESS COMES THROUGH DOORS YOU DIDN’T EVEN KNOW YOU LEFT OPEN, SO EVERYTHING IS ALWAYS OK IN THE END. IF IT’S NOT, THEN IT’S NOT THE END. BE KIND. ONE GOOD EXERCISE FOR THE HEART IS TO BEND DOWN AND HELP ANOTHER UP. IF ALL MY FRIENDS JUMPED OFF A CLIFF, I WOULDN'T JUMP WITH THEM. I WOULD BE AT THE BOTTOM TO CATCH THEM. ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT THE UNIVERSE ALWAYS WANTS BIGGER & BETTER THINGS FOR YOU. YOU CAN HAVE EVERYTHING YOU DESIRE. YOU ARE NEVER GIVEN A DREAM WITHOUT ALSO BEING GIVEN THE POWER TO MAKE IT COME TRUE. NEVER TAKE ADVICE FROM ANYONE WHO HAS NOT CREATED THAT WHICH YOU DESIRE IN YOUR LIFE. THESE PEOPLE HAVE THE OPINION OF WANTING TO SAVE YOU FROM YOURSELF. IT'S JUST THEIR OPINION. IT MAY BE WRONG FOR THEM – HOWEVER, IT'S EXACTLY RIGHT FOR YOU & WHAT YOU WANT. SO STOP TRYING TO GET EVERYTHING PERFECT AT ONCE. CREATE ALONG THE WAY. DO WHAT FEELS RIGHT FOR YOU AND DON'T LISTEN TO ANYONE WHO WANTS TO HOLD YOU BACK. JUST DO IT. FOCUS ON WHAT YOU WANT TO DO IN YOUR LIFE. WHAT YOU WANT TO CREATE IN YOUR LIFE. YOU CAN HAVE EVERYTHING THAT YOU DESIRE. YOU CAN CREATE IN YOUR WORLD ALL THAT YOU WANT. SEE IT IN YOUR MINDS EYE. FEEL IT IN YOUR HEART. FLOOD YOUR BODY WITH IT. THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU DESIRE RIGHT BEFORE YOU GO TO SLEEP & HAVE YOUR MIND THINK ABOUT IT ALL NIGHT. WHEN YOU REALLY BELIEVE IT, YOU CAN CREATE EVERYTHING YOU DESIRE IN YOUR LIFE. BELIEVE THAT YOU POSSESS SIGNIFICANT RESERVES OF HEALTH, ENERGY AND ENDURANCE AND YOUR BELIEF WILL CREATE THE FACT BUT BE COGNIZANT OF THE FACT THAT THE MAN WHO INSISTS UPON SEEING WITH PERFECT CLEARNESS BEFORE HE DECIDES, NEVER DECIDES. IT DOES NOT REQUIRE A MAJORITY TO PREVAIL, BUT RATHER AN IRATE, TIRELESS MINORITY KEEN TO SET BRUSH FIRES IN PEOPLE'S MINDS. NOTHING IN LIFE IS TO BE FEARED, IT IS ONLY TO BE UNDERSTOOD SO LET HIM THAT WOULD MOVE THE WORLD, FIRST MOVE HIMSELF AS NOTHING IN THIS WORLD IS SO POWERFUL AS AN IDEA WHOSE TIME HAS COME. AND NO, WAR IS NOT GOD'S WAY OF TEACHING US GEOGRAPHY. PAUSE TO REFLECT ON THE REAL SEVEN WONDERS OF THE WORLD: 1. TO TOUCH 2. TO TASTE 3. TO SEE 4. TO HEAR 5. TO FEEL 6. TO LAUGH 7. AND TO LOVE AND THOSE WHO WERE SEEN DANCING WERE THOUGHT TO BE INSANE BY THOSE WHO COULD NOT HEAR THE MUSIC BY THE PURPLE PIG PORK BAND. AND FINALLY, FOR THOSE THAT HAVE EXPERIENCED FAILURE IN ANY UNDERTAKING, KNOW THAT GOOD PLANS ARE EASY TO COME BY. FOR EVERY BAD PLAN, I WILL SHOW YOU 10 GOOD ONES. BUT SHOW ME A MAN WHO CAN MEND A BROKEN PLAN, AND I WILL MAKE HIM FREE OF MY QUARTERDECK AND MASTER OF HIS OWN SHIP. THE TEST TO FIND WHETHER YOUR MISSION ON EARTH IS FINISHED: IF YOU'RE ALIVE, IT ISN'T. IN REGAL GRATITUDE. THERE IS NO REASON NOT TO HAVE FUN. ZAP “GOD IS; I AM; WE ARE” “BE GOOD, BE LEGAL, TELL TRUTH” YOUR INTENT DETERMINES YOUR FOCUS. YOUR FOCUS DETERMINES YOUR REALITY. YOUR REALITY DETERMINES YOUR DESTINY. February 4, 2015 Copyright ZAP 2013-2015

What Is Your Most Dominant Character Trait? I knew this was a strong trait of mine but did not realize it was the "dominant" one - interesting ! What's Yours!! Take the test by clicking the link below - copy the results and bring back to the thread - paste the results and your comments as a reply - Let us know if you feel the test was accurate - I can't argue with my results as I feel it pretty much describes that part about myself -- Thanks in advance for sharing - I feel it is always a good time to do a little reflecting on ourselves <3 Being Analytical is your Most Dominant Character Trait! You have the ability to dig beneath the surface and read people and situations accurately. You are incredibly observant, and that makes your thought process both deep and complex. You don't take things for what they may seem to be at first sight and you have the gift of perception beyond the naked eye. You understand human actions, relationships, and body language exceptionally well, but you also have a strong understanding of books, art, and anything expressive that requires prolonged explanation. http://www.playbuzz.com/stephanies15/what-is-your-most-dominant-character-trait?utm_source=facebook.com&utm_medium=prom-hotstuff&utm_campaign=what-is-your-most-dominant-character-trait&utm_term=likers

This really struck a cord with me this morning -- I know I have started things many times at a disadvantage - I am no Einstein - Aristotle or Da Vinci but they continue to be my role models for creativity & excellence!! Maybe for gratitude Helen Keller - compassion Mother Teresa & Gandhi -- For perseverance Thomas Edison - for patience Job -- for forgiveness Jesus -- We all have our struggles -- we all have our own unique weaknesses & vulnerabilities -- We all also have our own defined gifts & talents & strengths We all make choices & decisions based on our level of knowledge & understanding but they can greatly be influenced by the above factors and our emotions / attitude I hope this will be a gentle reminder and will help you through any struggle or difficult time you are dealing with - UNEEK It's Time - Arise! Tonight I heard a minister tell a story that I found very insightful and I want to share it with you. He told a story about the Olympics that happened several years ago. Apparently it had rained heavily the day before the qualifications for runners. The track was extremely wet; they did all they could to get the water off the track but there were some spots where the water still remained. The officials knew it could possibly cause one of the runners to stumble, as the water was contained to one certain spot on the track, where only one runner would be placed. As that runner ran where the water was, sure enough, he slipped and fell. As he lay there on the ground, the crowd could hear him cursing and swearing. He did not qualify for the Olympics that year. As the next round of runners approached the track to qualify, the officials were once again concerned that the water spot would affect another runner; and it did. The runner that was in the same place as the one who had slipped and fallen was the one affected; as he approached the area where the water stood, he slipped and fell in the water, however what happened next allowed him to have an entirely different outcome from the first runner who had fallen. When the second runner slipped in the water and fell, instead of staying down, instead of lying there cursing, he instead pushed himself to roll and get back up and continue the race and it only caused him to gain more momentum and he won the race. The thing I want you to see is this; there will always be hindrances or obstacles that come in our path as we are running the race, what matters most is what we do when we slip and fall. We can do like the first guy when we slip and fall; we can become angry and curse and stay down, becoming disqualified for the prize at the end of the race. Or...when we slip and fall, we can push ourselves back up, gain momentum and finish the race...and get the prize. Your attitude is never more important than it is when you are seemingly down. The very moment you slip and fall or when an obstacle suddenly stops you in your tracks is the most important time to keep a good attitude and continue to press forward. We have an enemy and he will do whatever he can to cause you to stumble and fall and perhaps he will even succeed at putting a stumbling block in your way however that doesn't mean that weapon has to prosper against you, you can choose to use it as a stepping stone instead of a stumbling block and it can cause you to rise even higher..depending on your reaction to it. Failure doesn't come when we fall; it comes when we refuse to get back up. I once heard a statement in a Rocky Balboa movie that said 'it's not how hard you can hit that wins the fight, it's how hard you can get hit and keep getting back up.' I love the scripture that says 'don't rejoice when I fall for I shall arise.' That is a covenant person speaking, they know even if they fall, it is not the end for them, they shall arise. They don't think 'maybe I will arise, no, they know they SHALL arise...it is a sure thing.' Life may get you down from time to time...but don't let it keep you down. Get back up. Finish the race. Get the prize. Let nothing stop you from getting to the finish line. After all, nothing has the power to stop you but you. Kim Potter A New Thing Ministries PO Box 750 Dayton, TN 37321

Parable Of The Pencil The Pencil Maker took the pencil aside, just before putting him into the box. There are 5 things you need to know, he told the pencil, before I send you out into the world. Always remember them and never forget, and you will become the best pencil you can be. One: You will be able to do many great things, but only if you allow yourself to be held in Someone's hand. Two: You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, but you'll need it to become a better pencil. Three: You will be able to correct any mistakes you might make. Four: The most important part of you will always be what's inside. And Five: On every surface you are used on, you must leave your mark. No matter what the condition, you must continue to write. The pencil understood and promised to remember, and went into the box with purpose in its heart. Now replacing the place of the pencil with you; always remember them and never forget, and you will become the best person you can be. One: You will be able to do many great things, but only if you allow yourself to be held in God's hand. And allow other human beings to access you for the many gifts you possess. Two: You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, by going through various problems, but you'll need it to become a stronger person. Three: You will be able to correct any mistakes you might make. Four: The most important part of you will always be what's on the inside. And Five: On every surface you walk through, you must leave your mark. No matter what the situation, you must continue to do your duties. By understanding and remembering, let us proceed with our life on this earth having a meaningful purpose in our heart. ~ Author Unknown ~

Strange to get this result as I do not "feel" strong many times when things are hectic and seemingly overwhelming ! Things have been very hectic this past year and very overwhelming to say the least - My faith & hope in my mission & legacy and passion are my fuels What are your results? Take the test by clicking on the link below - copy the results and share with us -- <3 <3 You are: Exceptionally Strong Your resiliency level is: exceptionally gifted. You are mentally tough. A good analogy for you would be the Energizer Bunny -- basically something that just keeps going and going no matter what. You are able to overcome difficult situations and remain cool, calm and collected. You are always prepared to seek solutions and get back on track. You almost never let disappointments deter you from what you want -- instead, you stay focused and plan to be successful. The hardships you've faced in your life have been instrumental in developing this kind of amazing strength and perseverance within you. http://bitecharge.com/play/mentalstrength?sess=q1#q1

There is a lot of truth in these words that follow -- "Things" can be taken away from us - become broken & unusable - Memories / Experiences are ours to keep - hold on to & cherish as long as we live - Just something to think about -- <3 <3 UNEEK This Is Why You Might Spend Money On Experiences, Not Things By Teri Karl What are the things that you value most? One way to find out is by looking at how you spend your money. You’ve worked hard for your income, and you want to make the most of it. So, what’s really important to you? What are the things that you will cherish, that will always make you smile and will stay with you forever? It is the experiences that will last a lifetime, that you will look back on with joy and appreciation. A tangible purchase may give you a thrill, but consider investing in some memories, instead. Not convinced? Here are some reasons you might want to flip through that entertainment brochure, instead of browsing that product catalog. Natural Disasters Happen Life happens. Floods happen. Fires happen. Tornadoes happen. You get the picture. Your life can change in an instant, and a lifetime of accumulation can be lost forever. But your experiences are a permanent part of you. You may lose your photo albums, but the way you felt when you first saw the mountains, the activities you enjoyed on your first cruise, and that sunset you saw over the water in Hawaii — those memories will be with you forever. Things Go Out of Style, Degrade, Fade, and Disappear Do you still have bell-bottoms in your closet? Are your old computers, printers, and CD players still stored in the basement? It seems impossible to keep up with technology or fashion trends — they’re always changing! But your experiences are right here, right now. In fact, you may want to take advantage before you miss something! The rising waters of Venice are not going to recede for you. Old Beijing didn’t wait for you, and neither will the Amazonian rainforests in Brazil. That fantastic new tea shop will close if no one visits, and your favorite drive-in still needs movie-viewers. Items Change Value Though some items do increase in value, there’s no guarantee. Vases can chip, paintings can rip, rugs unravel, and cars lose thousands of dollars in value once you drive them off the lot. But your experiences are priceless. What kind of value can you put on biking your first century ride? What about that time those two dolphins raced alongside your boat, or that proposal you received at Moraine Lake? Do you also suck in your breath when you first see the ocean? After I got my first big job, I immediately treated myself to a Rick Steve’s Tour to Europe — one of the best decisions of my life. Money can’t buy you love, and it can’t buy you that perfect memory either. Clutter! I don’t think anyone intends to become a hoarder — it starts a little at a time! I want a lifestyle in which I can pack up at a moment’s notice and take an RV across the country! If you’ve ever had to move, you know how cumbersome all of those little knicknacks, holiday decorations, and assorted this-and-thats can become. Forget the stuff — pack up your necessities and head for the coast! And forget those mementos, just take lots of pictures! Digital photos take up space in your computer, not in your house! Shared Experiences Your stuff is just yours. Your computer, your car, your clothes, your coffee, your e-mails, your life. Isn’t it better when we share? How about that Cork & Canvas night with your friends? What about a fancy New Year’s Celebration in the city? Will you ever forget that first concert? Or your first time to the theater or the ballet? Do you like to be alone on your birthday? How about a group trip to Las Vegas? Or what about a cross-country road trip to see the Corn Palace and the world’s biggest rocking chair? You may not live in a palace, but you and your friends can take a tour of Hearst Castle! Or you can frequent that hole-in-the-wall that you and your friends have been meaning to try. Are you tired of watching your favorite team lose on TV? It’s always a good time at the ball park/court/stadium/rink! And I’d trade gifts for a dinner and game night any day. Create shared memories. They bring you and your loved ones closer together, and they are a great substitution for day-to-day small talk! Change Your Life Have you ever heard anyone on their death bed say, “I wish I’d bought that yacht.” Or “If I could have done it all over again, I would have bought that big screen/those diamond earrings?” Life is not about the tangibles. They stay behind when we go, and may be fought over by our descendants! We always want to have loved more, learned more, lived more. The love and memories we leave behind will last. Those unforgettable special experiences — and the hijinks — may be passed on from generation to generation. With every big or little adventure, you create a whole new you. Change your life, change a life! Visit that daughter in another state. Try that sushi restaurant; take your spouse salsa dancing! Take that mission trip and leave with a bigger heart. Live abroad and learn a new language; change your perspective of the world. Or just take a helicopter or balloon ride to overcome your fear of heights and get a whole new view! If all the world is a stage, don’t get stuck on the props! Don’t create a mountain of stuff — go out and experience life! This Is Why You Might Spend Money On Experiences, Not Things

Personal Growth Judgement OMTimes “When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.” ― Wayne W. Dyer Shift Your Perspective: On Judgment By Diana Wing Judgment is a debilitating practice—whether the judgment is toward others or toward yourself. It happens whenever you label someone in a general way. It is a snap evaluation of that person based on your past experiences and core beliefs. You draw a conclusion about something before knowing all the facts or considering it within the context of the situation. It is merely your perception of that person, and not the only truth. When you judge others, it serves to close you off from a connection with that person and from the lesson held within that interaction. Whether it’s about the actions, beliefs, or efforts of another, judging serves to limit understanding. It also directs negativity at that person. Live and let live to avoid judgment. When evaluating a person or circumstance, is it your intention to send that person negativity? How is what they are saying or doing striking a chord for you that creates a judgmental stance? It is the same when you point that judgment at yourself. That negative self-talk that arises with generalized statements such as, “Man, you’re so stupid,” or “I should have known better,” or the ever popular, “I can’t do anything right.” Now you’re sending negativity to yourself! This practice only serves to weaken you and lessen your ability to overcome challenges. Focus on the specific thing that just happened, the choice that was made, or action taken. Now consider how you perceived it and remember that you are on a path of growth. Maybe you just made a spontaneous choice that could have been given a bit more thought. Instead of calling yourself a disparaging name, tell yourself that the choice you made felt right in the moment and that next time, you’ll choose to give it additional thought before making a decision. That statement feels lighter, doesn’t it? How about when someone else is doing something that you don’t approve of? Maybe they are living a lifestyle different from. Rather than judging, tell yourself that it’s great to live in a country where a wide range of beliefs are possible. Or more specifically, thinking that the path they are on is what is right for them to learn the lessons they came here to complete. Acceptance holds a higher vibrational frequency. Each person is on the journey they are on because they chose it. Allowing yourself and others to travel on the path without judgment is a supportive gesture that leaves room for differences and for mistakes, while giving unconditional acceptance. Even in tarot, the Judgement card (yes, spelled with an “e”) expresses the understanding that learning through experience and from interactions with others allows one to take command of the situation in a way that is for the highest good. Who is to say what is best for one person or another, except the person herself. Rather than judging, try to understand the true nature of the person or the situation. Pay attention to the impact you have on others, as well as on yourself and see what can be learned in the process. To each his own! About the Author Diane Wing wants to live in a world where people feel inspired, create their ideal future, and experience a sense of wonder at everyday magic. As an author and perspective changer, she’s published four books – The True Nature of Energy: Transforming Anxiety into Tranquility, The True Nature of Tarot: Your Path to Personal Empowerment, Thorne Manor and Other Bizarre Tales, and Coven: The Scrolls of the Four Winds all available now on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Kobo, and iBooks. She is the founder of Wing Academy of Unfoldment, host of Wing Academy Radio, and has written a screenplay based on her novella, Thorne Manor. When it comes to getting unstuck and feeling great about life, her 9-word philosophy is: Let go. Be grateful. Stay open. See the magick. Find out more at: www.DianeWing.com http://omtimes.com/2014/07/shift-perspective-judgment/ “When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.” ― Wayne W. Dyer

20 Signs You’re Succeeding In Life Even If You Don’t Feel You Are By Carol Morgan We all feel like failures from time to time. While this is a normal feeling, you have to find a way to see yourself and your life from a different perspective. Sometimes we ignore the “little things.” Just because you are not a millionaire, don’t live in a mansion, and you don’t drive a fancy car, that doesn’t mean you’re a failure. In fact, it’s quite the contrary. Here are 20 signs that you are succeeding in life: 1. Your relationships are less dramatic than they used to be. Drama is not maturity. As we age, we should develop maturity. So maybe your relationships were drama-filled in your past, but if you have moved beyond that, then you are successful. 2. You are not afraid to ask for help and support any more. Asking for help does not equal weakness. In fact, it is a strength. No person has ever succeeded in isolation. It takes teamwork to accomplish goals. Asking or help is a sign that you have grown as a person. 3. You have raised your standards. You don’t tolerate bad behavior any more – from other people, or even yourself. You hold people accountable for their actions. You don’t spend time with the “energy vampires” in your life anymore. 4. You let go of things that don’t make you feel good. No, this is not narcissistic even though it might seem like it. Self-love is success. Love yourself enough to say ‘no’ to anything that doesn’t make you happy, doesn’t serve your purpose, or drags you down. 5. You have moments where you appreciate who you see in the mirror. Ideally, you should appreciate who you see in the mirror at every moment. But even if that doesn’t happen, if you do it more than you used to, then that is success. Love yourself. You are awesome. 6. You have learned that setbacks and failure are part of self-growth. Not everyone can have success 100% of the time. That’s just not realistic. Life is about victories and losses. So look at your setbacks as stepping stones to something better. In reality, there really is no such thing as as setback. It’s all just part of a wondrous journey. 7. You have a support system that includes people who would do anything for you. If you have figured out the people who “have your back” and recognized the ones who only pretend that they do, then you have succeeded. This is a painful realization, but once you learn to see the signs of betrayal, you can stay away from those people. 8. You don’t complain much. Because you know there really is nothing to complain about. Unless you really have gone through some horrific life experience and had unimaginable losses, most of what we all experience on a day-to-day basis is just mundane. And successful people know that. And they live in a space of gratitude. 9. You can celebrate others’ successes. Just because other people succeed, that doesn’t make you a failure. Applaud the people who rise to the top. The more positive energy you give to other people’s victories, the more you will create your own. 10. You have passions that you pursue. You are not stagnant. You know you have something wonderful to contribute to the world. You have unique talents and gifts. Not only do you know that, you pursue it. 11. You have things to look forward to. If you don’t have exciting things going on in your life that you are eagerly anticipating, then you are slowly dying inside. Successful people create goals that they are passionate about pursuing. They let this excitement drive their life. 12. You have goals that have come true. Even though “failures” are a part of life, you have stuck to your goals and dreams long enough to make them come to fruition. You have some tastes of victory. It fuels you. 13. You have empathy for others. A person without empathy is dead inside. Empathy equals spreading love and positive energy into the world. Successful people know this. They love others as if they are family. 14. You love deeply and open yourself up to be loved by others. Love is risky, and sometimes scary for people. It’s the one thing we all strive for, but it’s also intimately tied to the one thing we fear the most – rejection. If you open your heart enough to love and be loved, then you are successful. 15. You refuse to be be a victim. You know that life doesn’t always happen to you. Many times, you are a co-creator of your life experiences. Successful people know this and refuse to be kept down by life experiences. The rise up and conquer anyway. 16. You don’t care what other people think. You know you can’t please everyone. You know that the standards with which society judges people is many times unrealistic. So you just keep true to yourself and love the person you are. 17. You always look on the bright side. Life can be full of disappointments – if you choose to see them that way. Otherwise, they are learning opportunities. No negative experience is ever wasted as long as you learn from it. 18. You accept what you can’t change. Let’s face it – there many things you can’t change in life. All you can change is how you view what happens. If you can change your negative perspective on situations to a positive one, then you are successful. 19. You change what you can. And let’s face it again – there are many things you can change in life. Successful people don’t sit around accepting the negatives that are changeable. They get out there and do something about it!! 20. You are happy. To me, this is the ultimate definition of success. It doesn’t matter what the balance is in your bank account, how big your house is, or how many fancy vacations you take. If you are happy, then you are succeeding in life. Even if you don’t see yourself in many of these 20 things, don’t fret. It’s okay. Be happy that you see yourself in just a few. In time, the rest will come. You just need to keep moving onward and upward. http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/20-signs-youre-succeeding-life-even-you-dont-feel-you-are.html

What You And the World Would Be Like If Money Didn’t ExistBy Siobhan Harmer With all the financial responsibilities we are burdened with these days, it’s difficult to make the crucial choice: do we work for love, or do we work for money? Of course, it’s great if we can combine the two but life isn’t always that simple. In this video, we are asked what we would do with our lives if money didn’t exist. And so I ask you, what would you do?

I made several attempts to add the pictures even finding other pictures with no success - Sorry - I am a very visual person and like my pictures but the important thing here is that you get the "message" - have a great evening ,UNEEK Parable Of The Pencil The Pencil Maker took the pencil aside, just before putting him into the box. There are 5 things you need to know, he told the pencil, before I send you out into the world. Always remember them and never forget, and you will become the best pencil you can be. One: You will be able to do many great things, but only if you allow yourself to be held in Someone's hand. Two: You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, but you'll need it to become a better pencil. Three: You will be able to correct any mistakes you might make. Four: The most important part of you will always be what's inside. And Five: On every surface you are used on, you must leave your mark. No matter what the condition, you must continue to write. The pencil understood and promised to remember, and went into the box with purpose in its heart. Now replacing the place of the pencil with you; always remember them and never forget, and you will become the best person you can be. One: You will be able to do many great things, but only if you allow yourself to be held in God's hand. And allow other human beings to access you for the many gifts you possess. Two: You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, by going through various problems, but you'll need it to become a stronger person. Three: You will be able to correct any mistakes you might make. Four: The most important part of you will always be what's on the inside. And Five: On every surface you walk through, you must leave your mark. No matter what the situation, you must continue to do your duties. By understanding and remembering, let us proceed with our life on this earth having a meaningful purpose in our heart. ~ Author Unknown ~

14 Ways That Reveal Who You Really Are Communication Relationships By Asli Omur Many times those who are living a lie do so because they don’t feel it’s safe to reveal who they really are. They might be frightened by disapproval from friends and family. Or they may have been bullied as a child. Other times, avoiding an authentic life can be used to hide mental illness or self-hate. Here are 14 ways in which you reveal who you really are. If you’re brave enough, or if you dare, aim to share who you really are, little by little, everyday, with those you trust. You may be surprised at the reaction. If the reaction is not positive, you may need to re-think who you are inviting into your world. If you don’t feel you have a safe group of friends or family, yet, to share yourself with, go out and live with all your truth and conviction. Don’t forget a half-truth is still a lie. In time, you’ll attract those that need to be in your life. I promise. There is no greater comfort than settling into who you really are. Like Kurt Cobain once said, ”Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are.” 1. Hardships reveal who you really are. Allowing yourself to be exposed and raw is a very intimate experience. To really know yourself and others, what you are like at your most vulnerable, will include revealing yourself at your worst moments. Sometimes with tears streaming down your face or when you are emotionally downtrodden and weakened. It could be due to heartbreak, a job loss, disappointment, a death in the family or a divorce. All can be truly tragic and upsetting to the rhythm of your life and dreams. This is one way you will reveal who you really are. During hardship, you can choose to remain stagnant and fearful or you can learn from the misery or your poor choices and make a new path for yourself. 2. How you act when you’re upset. If getting upset or disappointed involves you taking your anger out on others (verbally or physically), you are revealing yourself negatively. It makes people want to step away from you and not be your friend. It repels good people from your life. Even your family members may want to separate from you, especially when you are furious and raging. If you take a time out to process the situation, and why you are so upset, and be cognizant of how you relate to others when you are pissed off, you’ll be better off. It won’t be easy for everyone. But controlling yourself even when life is not being kind will only benefit you. Never forget, as Mark Twain once wrote, “Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” 3. How you treat those who can do nothing for you. If you only care about impressing those in positions of power, or those who are rich or good-looking by society’s standards, so that you can benefit from this connection, you reveal yourself to be shallow, self-centered, narcissistic and lacking in empathy. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe is said to have written, “You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.” How you treat those in less prominent positions and those who may not be famous or well-known or powerful in society is very telling as to who you really are and what you really are. But if you’re tired of the way things have always been and are committed to another approach, you can change your habits. 4. Who you are when no one is looking. You are who you really are when no one is looking. Truer words have never been spoken, or written. It’s easy to do the ‘right thing’ when others are watching and taking note. But what you do and how you cope when there’s no one there is very powerful. If you are lying, cheating, hacking private e-mail accounts, plotting revenge, gossiping about others, taking advantage of someone, choosing what’s easy, are keeping and creating endless secrets, you are revealing an unhealthy way of living. Often, if who you are in private and the self you present to others and who you are inside, is drastically different it can cause significant stress and internal chaos. It’s like holding yourself emotionally hostage. If you are really scared to be who you really are in the company of others you care about, you may be overly preoccupied with how others view you, and how they might respond to your style or interests. Don’t pre-judge their reactions. Make it your aim in life to embrace yourself completely. Being who you really are relies on it. If you are being kind and welcoming, speaking honest and thoughtful words, and wishing only the best for yourself and others, you are revealing a healthy outlook worth continuing. 5. The types of relationships you pursue. Sometimes those who have not healed from past relationships, abusive situations or other traumas, will continue to pursue those that remind them of their troubled past. It’s important to remember that you are not your past. Your past is a part of your story, but it is not everything and you don’t have to keep reliving it everyday. Who you are attempting to date, marry or befriend can reveal who you really are, but if you are not fully healed, your pursuits may be skewed and are only temporary. If you find yourself interested in a particular type of personality, there may be a pattern to your choices. You may also be pursuing people because they reflect how you view yourself and the world. Your relationships can reveal a lot about who you really are. 6. How often you admit your own mistakes and failures. Mistakes and failures are a natural part of living. Without mistakes and failures, we wouldn’t learn all that we do. You may take responsibility for your actions and are honest about the part you play in the choices you make, you may not want to acknowledge your troubles at all, because you just can’t deal or you may be hesitant to mention where you went wrong because you are most concerned with how others will view you and what others will say or think of you. These are some ways you will reveal who you really are. Mary Pickford, one of the first actresses of the United States and Canada, once said, quite beautifully, “You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing that we call ‘failure’ is not the falling down, but the staying down.” Not only how often you accept responsibility for your actions but also how you cope with the failures will reveal who you really are. 7. How you treat people in need. Do you look down on those that have less than you? Do you pity them or come to their aid? Do you ridicule their style or make fun of them? Are you willing to help others or do you feel put out? However you may approach those in need will reveal who you really are. 8. What you read, listen to and get entertained by reveals who you really are. Do you like anime? Sadomasochistic films? Action or political satire? Do you enjoy listening to the radio or violent movies? Does a comedy make your evening complete or maybe a famous trilogy? Do you like classic literature or journaling your thoughts? Do you paint or work on engineering and coding? Or are you more business-minded? Do you collect dolls or something else? Do you prefer traveling, listening to records, or jogging? Do you frequent strip clubs, expensive resorts or casinos? Do you like photography, attending live music shows or gardening? Do you spend time wreaking havoc in your community, vandalizing and bullying passersby? Do you find pleasure from quiet time at the library or a soothing chat and tea with an elderly person? Do you use drugs to numb yourself or drink until you are passed out? Do you enjoy a weekly television program or cooking up edible delights from scratch? There are a million ways people like to be entertained. One’s entertainment preferences often reflect what’s going on inside their mind and heart. What you choose to do in your free time and what you find joy from tells all about your story and who you really are. 9. The way you approach your greatest failures. Your failures don’t define you, and you shouldn’t wallow in self-pity or punish yourself for the stones that may obstruct your path from time to time. But how you approach those struggles will reveal what you are made of and who you really are. If you use your failures as a time to attack those around you, play the blame game or belittle and humiliate, throw tantrums or yell obscenities, it’s time to take a look into your habits and character. Your greatest failures are often simply the beginnings of your greatest achievements. 10. What you find comforting reveals who you really are. If you find pleasure in the struggles of others (Schadenfreude), or laugh at their expense, because it makes you feel better about yourself, you are revealing yourself negatively. If you find comfort in loving, sharing and being kind, you are revealing an empathetic approach to others. Celebrating someone’s bad days just because you feel low about yourself isn’t cool or interesting. It doesn’t make you seem fun or enticing to hang around. What you find comforting and relaxing will reveal quite a bit about who you really are and what you really want out of life for yourself and those around you. 11. How you spend your money. Going on spending binges, spending money you don’t have or at the other end of the spectrum, never spending any money and living very frugally are all ways of revealing who you really are and what you feel inside. Do you spend your money to help others, your community or to furnish a comfortable, inviting home? Do you enjoy spending your money on loved ones and family members? Are you cautious with where your money goes? Do you keep a financial log and save all your receipts? The way you spend money and view finances shows a lot about who you really are. 12. How you speak of others behind their backs. Gossiping, accusing, criticizing, unsolicited advice and blatant lying are some peoples choices when offered a chance to speak of others. Others might opt to not talk about others private comments and personal life, but instead focus on kind and respectful words or not talk too much at all about others when they are not around, to avoid denigrating another’s character or life, out of turn, and without all the facts. Remember that what you say about others will reveal a lot about how you feel about yourself. What you say about others will show who you really are. If you need to speak the truth about someones hurtful or negative actions and their impact in your life, it’s a quite different story, however. 13. The choices you make are revealing of who you really are. When you are faced with options, how you choose reveals who you really are and what you really want. Do you go for the easy route? Or is being brave and daring important to you? Do you like new ways of approaching an old topic? Do you reach out to a counselor or is your father’s opinion more important to you? Do you go for the popular choice or the most healthy option? The pattern of your choices are a big part of your true self. 14. How you argue. Fighting fair is an integral part of any relationships. Do you go straight to the most insulting retort? Do you hear out your friend or partner? Or do you opt for swift revenge? Revenge will only lead to more emotional injury and show that who you really are isn’t so healthy. As Mahatma Gandhi once stated, “An eye for an eye will only make the whole world blind.” If that’s the way you have been operating and want to change, you can change how you fight or argue. When you fight, do so neutrally, recognizing that perfection is illusive. Be present, open and honest. Don’t keep score and don’t demand someone read your mind or try to do that of others. If you want to reveal a healthy and revitalized self, you’ll listen and encourage the same of them, when it’s your turn to talk. The way you choose to argue or discuss a disagreement shows a lot about who you really are and what you are about. Remember that almost everything we live is a choice. Asli Omur is a journalist and writer living in San Francisco, where she engages in sweaty uphill walking, dog-whispering, picture-taking and curious discoveries, amongst much else. Hers is a global existence, peppered with written words (also sometimes still stuck in her thoughts), cultures, languages, art, literature, films, old cameras, out-of-print books, air mail envelopes, self-reflection, technology and zen. http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/14-ways-that-reveal-who-you-really-are.html

10 Things Nothing Else But A Heartbreak Will Teach You Communication Relationships by Simmi A heartbreak can act as a brake to your sweet fleeting life. And even the inundation of expert advice from your close ones, in such situations, proves ineffective because the one going through hell at that time is you, all alone, right? And this short journey through h*** ultimately leads you to things that otherwise are “esoteric” (only meant or understood by a special group of people). So read on and acquaint yourself with these 10 things that only a heartbreak can teach you. SPOILER ALERT: If you have previously gone through a heartbreak, you may empathize with the following given points. 1. Relationships cannot survive on love alone. You might think that love is all you need in a relationship, but ask someone who has been rejected or heartbroken. Love is not the only key for a good relationship; there are various aspects to it. You might have heard people saying, “we both love each other so much, yet our relationship is on the rocks” or, “in spite of loving each other, we have decided on a mutual break-up.” Such statements might have confused you, but a person who has gone through a heartbreak very well understands it. A heartbreak will practically throw you out of your dreamy zone and familiarize you with reality. 2. Heartbreak is not just a metaphor. Until you really witness the ordeal of a Heartbreak, you can only mock or sympathize with the people going through it. A heartbreak can only teach you that physical pain is not the worst kind of pain in the world; “heartbreak”is, because it isn’t just psychological—it’s physical as well. “There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds.” —Laurell K. Hamilton 3. Feelings are untrustworthy. Feelings are like vortex of emotions; they draw everything that surrounds them toward the center, sometimes engulfing your own life. So to trust on your feelings completely is not at all safe. And a heartbreak can very well teach you that. It can make you understand that your feelings are mere perceptions experienced by your body for particular situations. The feelings which once made you strong and steady can also make you weak and fragile and vice versa. So a crucial lesson a heartbreak can teach you is to judge people by their actions also and not entirely based on your feelings towards them. 4. Some doors are meant to be shut. A Heartbreak can teach you the most important lesson of life which otherwise is hard to get: “Nothing in life is immortal.” In life, you might often wish that some good things always continue to exist, but you get all perplexed the moment they seem to cease. You must have dedicated some part of your life to making sure that good thing continues existing, but when such a thing gets lost, you are not able to let it go, and there will always a part in you that longs for it, making your life miserable. But only a heartbreak can teach you that it’s better to close some doors as they don’t lead anywhere. “Sometimes we need to forget some people from our past because of one simple reason: they just don’t belong in our future.” —Anonymous 5. Self-adequacy. The feeling of self-adequacy is the most important lesson a heartbreak can teach you. Self-adequacy implies that one views oneself as capable of dealing satisfactorily with problems or in the things one sets out to do. Well, before a heartbreak you think that your loved one is the person responsible for your happiness or either you are the one responsible for his problems or vice-versa, but the trauma of a heartbreak can very well make you understand your own competence or ability towards your own happiness. You realize that no one else but you yourself are responsible to either make or break your life. 6. Life still goes on. “I love you and I’d rather be happy with you, than without you, but with or without you, life still goes on. I’ll be OK.” The above quoted lines beautifully explain the feelings known to a heartbroken person. Prior to heartbreak, you cannot imagine a life without your loved one. You might feel that life would stop or everything around you will cease if your loved one is not there with you. But a heartbreak can grimly make you realize that time stops for no one and life goes on even when you are not ready. 7. Good and evil are two sides of the same coin. From past times, it’s been said that good and evil are two sides of the same coin. Though that statement is quite baffling, a person gone through a heartbreak will definitely approve on that. Anyone who has been abandoned or rejected knows how the same person who was so good and caring earlier can become evil and harmful later. Even the idea of loving and hating the same person at one point that seems so weird to most of us, but it is an actual truth for a person who has been through heartbreak. 8. Heartbreak illustrates your weaknesses. “Some people pass through our lives for a reason to teach us lessons that could never be learned if they stayed.” —Mandy Hale Yes, heartbreak can in a way prove beneficial to you. It can make you aware of your inner weaknesses. People are not able to accept their faults or become sullen if their weaknesses are pointed out by others. But a heartbreak can surely make you aware of your weak points, in a way giving you an opportunity for self-improvement. 9. Life is unpredictable. A heartbreak can categorically teach you that surprises are a part of life. Prior to a heartbreak, no matter how much you planned for your future love life, it was all shattered into pieces. You received what was unexpected from life. You were sure about your lover and his or her insights, but what happened later was a violent blow on your predictions. 10. Enlightening love. Last but not least, a heartbreak can enlighten you more about love than anything else in the world. You understand the complexities involved with it. And no matter how much it might have hurt you, a heartbreak can never wipe out love from your heart. You don’t lose the power of being loved or to love someone entirely. “A baby is born with a need to be loved—and never outgrows it.” —Frank A. Clark http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/10-things-nothing-else-but-heartbreak-will-teach-you.html

Compassion is not a luxury -- Humanity would not survive without it 10 (Science-Based) Reasons Why Compassion Is Hot Written By Dr. Emma Seppala Science suggests that compassion may well be the most important thing in your life. 1. It makes us happy (as happy as getting money)! A brain-imaging study headed by neuroscientist Jordan Grafman from the National Institute of Health showed that the “pleasures centers” in the brain, i.e. the parts of our brains that are active when we experience pleasure (like dessert, money, sex) are equally active when we observe someone giving money to charity as when we receive money ourselves! 2. In fact, it makes us happier than buying things for ourselves. Giving to others increases well-being above and beyond spending money on ourselves! In a revealing experiment published in Science by Harvard Business School professor Michael Norton, participants received a sum of money. Half of the participants were instructed to spend the money on themselves and the other half were told to spend the money on others. At the end of the study, participants that had spent money on others felt significantly happier than those that had spent money on themselves. This is true even for infants! A recent study by Elizabeth Dunn and colleagues at the University of British Columbia shows that, even in children as young as 2, giving treats to others increases their happiness more than receiving treats themselves. 3. It makes us attractive. Marketing companies may try to tell us that the secret to finding our soulmate lies in anti-wrinkle chemical peels or muscle-inflating protein powders. However, both men and women agree that a major secret to attractiveness is a kind heart. In a study on dating preferences, researchers found that one trait both genders agreed was important in potential partners kindness. 4. It uplifts everyone around us. Why are the lives of people like Mother Teresa, Martin Luther King, and Desmond Tutu so inspiring? Research by Jonathan Haidt at the University of Virginia suggests that seeing someone helping another person creates a state of “elevation.” Have you ever been moved to tears by seeing someone’s loving and compassionate behavior? Haidt’s data suggests that it may be this elevation that then inspires us to help others — and it may just be the force behind a chain reaction of giving. 5. It spreads like wildfire. Social scientists James Fowler of UC San Diego and Nicolas Christakis of Harvard demonstrated that helping is contagious — acts of generosity and kindness beget more generosity in a chain reaction of goodness. You may have seen one of the news reports about chain reactions that occur when someone pays for the coffee of the drivers behind them at a drive-through restaurant or at a highway tollbooth. People keep the generous behavior going for hours. Try this at home. 6. It boosts our health and longevity. Helping others may lead to health, longevity and happiness. University of Michigan researcher Stephanie Brown, in a study of over 400 elderly people, found that those who helped others more were healthier, happier and lived longer than others. Of course, one reason for these findings may be that people who are healthier have more opportunity to be of help to others. However, data indicates that positive emotions and social connections (both a consequence of helping others) have a positive and protective effect on health that may explain these findings. For example, a study by Sheldon Cohen at Carnegie Mellon University showed that people with more social connections have higher immune function and are les likely to get sick. Another large-scale study showed that the opposite of compassion — i.e., not feeling connected to others — is as dangerous for our health as smoking, high blood pressure, obesity, and lack of exercise. 7. It gets us out of a funk. Think of a time you were feeling blue and suddenly a close friend or relative called you for urgent help with a problem. All of a sudden your attention was on helping them. Rather than feeling blue, you began to feel energized and before you knew it, you felt great! Research shows that depression and anxiety are linked to a state of self-focus, a preoccupation with “me, myself, and I.” When you do something for someone else, however, that state of self-focus immediately dissolves. 8. It’s the most natural thing. One reason why compassion might feel so good is that it’s natural to us. Though economists and grumps may ba-humbug, many spiritual traditions teach us that, at our core, we are loving, generous, and kind. Research with infants backs up these claims. Michael Tomasello and other scientists at the Max Planck Institute have found that infants automatically engage in helpful behavior. Dale Miller at the Stanford Business School shows that adults, too, are also automatically driven to help others. The difference between children and adults is that adults will often stop themselves because they worry that others think they are self-interested. 9. It gives us more time. With hectic modern-day schedules, we are all running out of one basic commodity: time! A recent study, however, suggests that helping others actually helps us feel like we have more time. A recent study by Cassie Mogilner of the Wharton Business School examined the impact of wasting time, spending time on oneself, gaining “free” time, and spending time on others. Mogilner and her colleagues found that spending time of others increased participants’ subjective sense of having more time — yet another way in which giving makes use feel better. 10. It’s good for the environment. No scientific evidence needed here. Being kind, caring and empathetic to your friends, colleagues, neighbors and strangers on the street just makes sense. It’s not only good for you, its good for our society, community, and the world around us. And since it’s contagious, why not spread it far and wide? Source: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/project-compassion-stanford/compassion_b_1676485.html#slide=1238025 - See more at: http://ccare.stanford.edu/the-huffington-post/10-science-based-reasons-why-compassion-is-hot/#sthash.UpJAg6Ly.dpuf

3 Studies Confirm the Healing Powers of Pet Ownership from Bewellbuzz.com Science is finding support for what many of us have known all along: owning a pet is good for the soul… and body. The CDC (Center for Disease Control) plainly states that pets can lower blood pressure and cholesterol levels, cure loneliness, increase exercise and improve social life. Just last month the AHA released a scientific statement backing these claims with research. Other research has shown that pet-owners with AIDS are less likely to be depressed than non-owners; that kids growing up with cats and/or dogs, perhaps surprisingly, tend to have fewer allergies and asthma, stronger immune systems, and learn greater responsibility. Yet another study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology looked specifically at three different conditions to get a more fine-tuned understanding of how pets affect a person’s life. They compared pet owners to non-owners; affectionate vs. less affectionate animals; and observed the healing power of an animal friend after a rejection experience. Study 1: Furry Friend vs. Furry Friendless 217 men and women at a local university, with mean age 31, filled out an approximately 1-hour survey. The questions were geared to determine whether the anonymous participant tended towards depression, loneliness and low self-esteem, or was open to experience, agreeable, conscientious and extroverted. The 50 who didn’t have pets were only assessed for their emotional, mental and social wellness. The others were also assessed regarding their pet relationships. If there was any significant difference between the emotional states of those with and without pets, then researchers knew they could be on to something. They found roughly two categorical differences between the two groups: The 167 pet owners reported greater self-esteem, better physical fitness and less loneliness than non-owners. They were “more conscientious and extroverted…, less fearful, and less preoccupied.” Strong attachments to pets did not come at the expense of attachments with human relations. In fact, the closer a person was with their furry friend, the greater they reported “closeness to and support from their best friends, parents, and siblings.” Lastly, in this segment of the research, the team looked at owners only. Those who tended to anthropomorphize, or ascribe human qualities, to their pet companion suffered more depression and claimed less happiness. This could be sort of like ascribing our mean Aunt Jane’s flippancy to the cat’s independence. If we believe the animal is rejecting us in the same way as humans did in our past, then we might project human misbehavior onto them. Interestingly, even this group did not tend to claim loneliness, but mostly a sour mood. Study 2: Man’s Best Friend…and Predictor of Good Health In this second study, we begin with an age-old idea also backed by decades of research; namely, that excellent human social support predicts greater well-being. If my closest relations are affectionate and supportive of me, then I’m more likely to be happy and healthy. Here, they wanted to explore if the same could be said of dogs. That is, can support and affection from one’s dog predict health and happiness? The answer they found: yes. If the dog was perceived as anti-social, fearful or aggressive, the benefits lagged. But where the dog behaved warmly and fulfilled social needs, the people’s well-being soared. Also an important finding, the pet benefits were independent of human relations. That means that having a dog, and probably any other affectionate animal-friend, can bring fulfillment and boost wellness even when humans are letting you down. Happily, as in the first study, there was a positive correlation between pet and people relations. “That is,” the authors concluded, “pets generally complement other forms of social support rather than compete with them (or serve as surrogates when other sources of social support are deficient).” Most often, having a great relationship with your dog will be conducive to your social life with people. It appears that this bond strengthens self-esteem, increases happiness and promotes health. Study 3: The Cure for Rejection Do our animal companions have the power to help us heal from rejection, even as our best friends do? This last study brought pet-owners into the labs, where the team induced loneliness and isolation by having them write about an upsetting rejection experience. L Then they were divided into three groups. Some had to follow the depressing exercise by writing about a best friend, their closest pet, or as a control group, a map of the campus. The results? Human and non-human friends fared equally in restoring cheer to the participants. According to subsequent questioning, those who drew a map left, sadly, dejected (I really hope they went home to a Fido or a Heathcliff); whereas both other groups were restored to a positive outlook and overall wellness. The team of researchers therefore called the animals “social resources,” with the potential to bring emotional healing and restoration. If you’ve ever had an affectionate relationship with an animal, whether dog, cat, horse or hamster, I’d bet you could vouch for everything here and more. Scientific studies are sure nice for validation. It could be that the day is upon us when we’ll prescribe a kitten, puppy or chubby little ginny pig before risky anti-depressants. Pet therapy, anyone? —————- BeWellBuzz provides important scientifically researched natural health and personal development information. Created by Larry Oz, a natural health & personal development advocate who seeks to awaken people to their highest levels of personal truth. He and his wife Oksana work hard to inspire you to elevate your spirit, do more, live better, and think deeper one day at a time. Check out their website at http://www.BeWellBuzz.com and their magazine in the Apple Newsstand located here. Sources: (1) http://www.cdc.gov/healthypets/health_benefits.htm (2) http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21824172 (3) “Pet Ownership and Cardiovascular Risk: A Scientific Statement From the American Heart Association” (4) http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/07/09/health-benefits-pets-respiratory-infection-healthier-kids_n_1659424.html (5) http://www.motherearthnews.com/natural-health/health-benefits-of-pet-ownership-zmaz85zsie.aspx?PageId=2#axzz2WnVT7z6X (6) Brown, McConnel. “Friends With Benefits: On the Positive Consequences of Pet Ownership.” DOI: 10.1037/a0024506 (7) http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21728449 (8) http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/10078895 - See more at: http://www.evolutionezine.net/3-studies-confirm-the-healing-powers-of-pet-ownership-from-bewellbuzz-com/#sthash.pBmBIRi5.dpuf

Taking Responsibility For Yourself By Ann Christine Johnson Response-ability is the ability to respond to all that is happening around you and all that is happening in your life. It is the ability to respond positively and creatively to the many challenges of life: change, loss, bereavement, infirmity, disease, accidents, old age; to other people’s choices of behavior; and to the many frightening and disturbing things that are happening in this world of ours, instead of reacting or over-reacting to everything. Many people today feel pressured and overwhelmed by work, family and financial commitments. They haven’t yet learned to take full responsibility for their behavior. Often they lose control, reacting and over-reacting to things happening around them. Usually there is the tendency to blame others for their discomfort, instead of looking within for the source of their unhappiness. When you can learn to observe and change your part in relationship patterns; when you can learn to stop taking things so personally; when you can detach from the petty irritations of life, other people’s flaws and all forms of negativity (fear, anger, resentment) then you will be able to be more in control of yourself and your life. Personal responsibility means being responsible for your own thoughts, feelings and actions; for living your life with integrity; and for monitoring your own feelings to determine whether you are still connected to Source Energy (God, Universal Love), or not. For fostering and protecting your own emotional and psychological health; for your own personal and spiritual growth; for facing your fears and managing your life in ways that will prevent burnout; for how you allow the past and other’s behavior to affect your current level of happiness. It means being responsible for the way that you behave around others. When someone says something that evokes a strong reaction in you, this is because they have pressed a button for you. This means there is something within you that has yet to be resolved. There maybe be a hidden hurt or fear (lurking unknown to you) somewhere below the surface of your consciousness waiting for someone or something to trigger it; or there maybe something within you which has finally come to the surface to be resolved. The strong reaction on your part gives you an insight as to what needs to be resolved or healed. Although it is inappropriate to hit out at another person, being human you will react from time to time. By apologizing to the other person for your behavior, and meaning it; by resolving to make every effort to avoid any future outbursts, you are taking responsibility for yourself and your behavior towards others. Don’t be overly responsible for other people in any aspect of their lives, and don’t allow others to dump their responsibilities and problems onto you. Other people’s choice of behavior in any given situation is up to them. By interfering, becoming too involved or protecting others from the consequences of their actions, you may be preventing others from making progress in their lives. Steer clear of “psychic vampires” – ordinary people who, lacking in vitality, drain healthy people of their energies, usually with the unconscious intent of doing so. Steer clear of chronic complainers, the chronically angry, fault finders and blamers. Being around such persons will exhaust you. If you spend your time taking responsibility for yourself and your own life then maybe you can teach those around you to do the same.

I think it would be really neat for members to share some specific events that support this "synchronicity" - I have had many over the years -- Some say there are no "coincidences" - that everything is by design and divine purpose -- hummmm interesting -- I hope some will share their experiences -- and thoughts - I find this very interesting and hope you enjoy the read <3 UNEEK Synchronicity … The Phenomenon By Sarah Delamere Hurding syncronicity, magical, logic, life, intuition, soul, Sarah Delamere Hurding If there’s one thing you should know about, it’s synchronicity. Always wondered what those coincidences in life – big and small – really mean? Have you ever been thinking about someone you haven’t seen for months only to bump into them in a busy shopping center? Or have their name to flash up on your mobile moments before you key in their number? This is the tantalizing nature of synchronicity. We all have examples of intriguing, significant coincidences that have happened along the way. But sit down and try to define the quality of these magical moments, and it is likely you’ll run into difficulty. It doesn’t help that we tend to be ruled by our logical minds, which tell us to put everything into a safe, ordered box, and dismiss apparently random events. But these synchronicities are happening everywhere in our daily lives – whether we choose to notice them or not. If we close our minds to this phenomenon, we run the risk of reducing life to a purely material, painfully tedious, humdrum level. Synchronicity is a magical thing that has the power to transform and enhance our lives if we decide to give it air time. A greater understanding of synchronicity unlocks our innate creativity and oomph, as well as our ability to manifest good things, and choose the life path that’s right for us. We are all interconnected by an energetic World-Wide-Web. Understanding synchronicity greatly enhances our life experience by helping us tune into our weird and wonderful Universe. These moments have an energizing, significant quality that connects us to each other, and to the hub of life itself. Synchronicity reassures us that our lives really do have an inherent meaning. It’s comforting to think that there IS a pattern and destiny within the chaos, emphasizing life’s magical quality. Synchronicity is not the reflection or projection of a mad psyche, or an imagining designed to make us feel better. Psychic is not the same as psycho! These are real events, providing food for thought, if not nourishment for the soul. Synchronicity directly reflects our inner and outer reality. For, it is when our inner moments are reflected in the outside world that our realities collide. When this happens, our inner-tuition is validated by a wonderful external event. We feel vindicated and liberated in one fell swoop. Magick! There definitely seems to be a link between heightened intuition and synchronicity. My life as a psychic has been full of events too numerous to mention, that continually reassure me that synchronicity is a phenomenon which hits the spot time and time again. There is no doubt that synchronicity makes us aware of the powerful forces at work in the Universe, and encourages us to increasingly trust our hunches. It is when we pay attention to what’s really going on, that our intuition kicks in and begins to help us in practical ways. As we trust it, we then begin to access the power center within that ALWAYS knows what to do next. Intuition is a significant part of our psyche which can be opened up and developed, making us more prone to the synchronistic moments that reveal so much. It acts as a strong indicator, and yields profound clues about what can happen next. My upbringing was both traditional and academic – my father is a doctor, psychotherapist, Anglican lay reader and author, I was also taught to be empathetic and open to life’s magic and mystery. My Scorpio Nan is well known for her intuition, even at the ripe old age of 93! Her memory is now severely impaired, but she still possesses the ‘Gift’ which I obviously inherited. Nan was always able to predict the arrival of an unplanned guest, and would have inevitably made their favorite food the day before on a whim! Jung famously coined the phrase ‘meaningful coincidence’ when he researched the phenomenon of synchronicity. He identified three different types of this magical moment. The ability to PREDICT events is the first of these. Some of you may remember that I blew the socks off Louis Walsh (not easy!) when I predicted the full line up of SIX, months before the judges had themselves decided. I put names in an envelope in October, and the protégés were unveiled in February, minus Nadine Coyle who had famously lied about her age. My sixth choice was her replacement. COINCIDENCE is the second type of synchronicity, which you may experience when a book falls open at the right page, or drops off the shelf in the library. Or you get that phone call just as you are dialing the person calling YOU!I was amazed to see Bono’s drawing of ‘Mermaid in the Temple Bar’ for the I-Cross charity released in November 2002. We had bumped into each other on the beach in October, when I had just written the first chapter of my book ‘Mermaid in the Kitchen’. I subsequently opened up the paper to find his Mermaid sketch staring back at me, dated October 2002. Even though we are friends, neither of us was conscious of the similar title and theme of our work at that point! The third example of synchronicity is TELEPATHY. This can come in the form of a dream, vision, or ‘sensing’ what someone is experiencing a distance away. When I lived in Edinburgh, I would regularly turn up on my pregnant friend’s doorstep with the relevant craving of the day. Even quite obscure things like Kumquats, Black-eyed Beans and melons from the corner shop found their way into my bag. By opening our minds to synchronicity we are able to amplify our intuition. Rather like flexing a psychic muscle, it’s a case of use it or lose it! The observation of synchronicity offers us a practical way to develop intuitive awareness. The more tuned-in to the universe we are, the more able we are to recognize the right way forward. Our intuition, when it’s truly jumping, enables us to access our best options. By being more psychic and intuitive, we allow destiny to take a hand in a profound way. As we grow, and become increasingly aware, synchronicity can also be a highly effective form of guidance, revealing clues from our Guardian Angel, Higher Self, or Innate Psychology. Once when I needed guidance about what to do with my beloved Dashund Freddie, who had been making improvements after a nasty road accident, I looked out of the window, and there against a clear blue sky were three images which answered the question. The first cloud was in the shape of a Dashund lying down, the second was of a Daschund running; then there was a gap, and finally there was an image of a Dashund leaping heavenwards. The answer was clear; it was time to let him go. Synchronicity gets us into the groove most effectively when we are, as Jung described it, ‘INDIVIDUATED’. This level of maturity and unity with the universe is difficult to achieve. We can but try! The Individuated person is a formidable force indeed. This person has a sophisticated knowledge of symbols, and is usually able to analyze, but not over interpret, life’s synchronicities. Likely to have heightened psychic ability and spiritual awareness, an individuated human being knows the value of meditation, silence and humor. Let’s just call her Little Miss Perfect (or Mr Right-on-cue!).Everyone’s personal journey is different. With synchronicity offering to put the wind in our sails, we can certainly look forward to feeling empowered and free. A word of warning! There is a danger in reading too much into every little thing, and one can go too far. We are more powerful than we realize, and synchronicity definitely underlines that fact. We are, indeed, so creative that we CAN manifest quite effectively our hopes and fears simply by focusing. It goes without saying then, that it’s best to keep it positive! A negative spiral of thinking helps no one, and you may be blocking your synchronistic moments if you give your insecurities too much air time. We are creative beings who structure our lives from minute to minute. So learn to access what you want, need and desire, as opposed to what you dread and fear. Project the good stuff into the ether by ditching negative thought patterns. It is better not to think at all than to think negatively. Empty your mind of emotional debris and clutter, then relax and begin to visualize every good thing. It really is as simple as that. Remain open and receptive to your destiny. At all times, use your skills of discernment and wisdom, too. Your synchronistic moments will then naturally increase, and you will have ample confirmation from the Universe that you are well and truly on track.

I offer this post to anyone that might be discouraged, weary, frustrated, tired, disappointed, depressed, angry, fed up, and ready to give up - May it give you a renewed hope - Hang in there folks - Be encouraged - Be Hopeful - Be Grounded - Be Grateful - You are still in the race! UNEEK By FaithRider » May 14th, 2013, 12:09 pm • Endure Until the End He who endures to the end shall be saved. Matthew 24:13 I was reminded today about a conversation I once had with my designer. I was talking with her about a season we had come through. I was telling her how much I appreciated her hanging in there with us. I began to thinkabout the trait I have come to admire in a person is just that, the ability to hang in there no matter what. I don't think this is a trait we are born with; I think it is one of those things that have to be developed in us. You know, those things God must work in us. And the only way to do that is to go through some stuff. It's like praying for patience. God will answer, but His answer will come through times of needing patience and choosing patience when you'd rather not. Right? It's the same with endurance. If you have received our motivations for very long you know my favorite statement, the one my family grows weary of hearing, everything is a choice. You can choose to be happy or mad. You can choose to have faith or doubt. You can choose to trust God or not. Endurance is the same, it's a choice. You are simply choosing to stand when everything around you is telling you to quit. Remember Job? He was in the middle of a time of great challenge. This time had touched his heart when he lost his children, his finances when it touched his crop and animals and then, it touched his body. Yet, Job didn't speak against God. His wife said to him, "Are you still holding on to your integrity? Curse God and die!" She was encouraging him to speak against God, to say that God wasn't who God said He was. Now remember, to bless means to empower to prosper, therefore to curse would stop God from working on his behalf. What she was encouraging Job to do was to react according to his flesh and what he was feeling in his emotions. As believers go through times of challenge they often fall into that same trap. They begin to question God and say things like 'why are you letting this happen to me?' Or 'why are you not coming through for me?' These are questioning God; these are cursing God and putting Him in a position where He can't work on their behalf. Never do this, no matter what the enemy throws your way, don't question God. Questioning God is doubt and unbelief. God once told me this 'wondering is wavering, wavering is doubt, doubt is sin.' Don't allow your mind to begin to wonder, if you do this will lead you down a path that will take you directly to sin, the sin of unbelief. Let's look at something else she said 'are you still holding your integrity?' What does that mean? When I looked it up in the Strong's Concordance it means to complete, become whole, to completely cross over. Aha! You see when you choose to endure to the end; you completely cross over to God's side. You are no longer out in the middle trying to decide if you are fully persuaded, no, you are completely, wholly convinced that God will do what God said He would do and there is no backing up. This is the last place the enemy wants you and he will do everything in his power to keep you from this place. Because you simply can't stop someone who refuses to stop. And that is who we are. God is amazing, we are not asked to fight a battle that can't be won. No! The battle has already been won, Jesus defeated Satan completely at the cross. God is simply asking us to trust Him and to endure to the end. It's that simple, trust God and stand. Anyone can do that, no, it's not always easy, but it is possible and it is all it takes to see the full manifestation of your promise. When you feel you can't do anything more, simply stand. The battle has been fought and won, you are the victor, Jesus caused you to be more than a conqueror through what He did, you only have to believe God, stand and receive. Matthew 24:13 says 'he who endures to the end shall be saved.' Saved means delivered, healed, set free, prosperous, at peace, it means everything that you have need of. So, stand! Endure! Endure to the end and deliverance will be seen. That is all that is expected of you and God has granted you the ability to do just that. Become a person who never quits, become a person the enemy can't stop; you can make it all the way to the end. Kim Potter A New Thing Ministry PO BOX 750 Dayton, TN 37321

THE BRIDGE Long ago there were two brothers who loved each other very much as their parents had taught them. They lived on adjoining farms only divided by a small creek bed that they had bought as their parents got older so they could be together. One day they fell into a conflict with one another. It was the first serious rift in 40 some odd years of their lives. Years of farming the land of their farms had come and gone. They bought machinery together and used it between them without any disagreements. They shared crops when one or the other was not so productive in the season. They traded labor and goods as needed without a hitch. Then the long collaboration fell apart. It began with a small misunderstanding one day when one was in a bad mood and it finally exploded into an exchange of bitter words then silence between the two. Brotherly love just flew out the door because they were exceeding their pride in each one being right no matter the cost at the moment. It went on for months, even though both were lonely and missed his brother, pride just would not let them solve the issue. Both went to the same church and silently prayed for a blessing to correct this between them but wouldn't humble themselves enough to find peace. They sat separately from one another and people in the church could tell they had problems but would not inquire for fear of upsetting one or the other. Both were highly respected in the community. They loved their God as their parents had taught them. One morning there was a loud knock on one brother's door. He opened it to find a man with carpenters toolbox in hand. He was a stranger in the area but looked humble enough. He was a man of medium build with a beard and slim face and there was something about his eyes and voice that made him trust worthy. "I'm looking for a few days work, perhaps you would have some small jobs around your farm that I could help with". The brother thought for a minute and then the thought hit him, " I do have a job you can do for me". I want a fence built on my side of the small creek bed that divides my land from that farm across the way so I don't have to look at it over there any more. "That's my neighbor, matter's fact that's my younger brother". Last week there was a beautiful meadow between us and he took his bulldozer to it and destroyed its beautiful looks, he also took it and widened the little creek so it was wider and now deeper than ever. I know he did this to spite me, so I will do him one better. See that pile of lumber over there by the barn? I want you to build me a fence....an 8 ft tall fence so I want need to see his place or his face anymore. The carpenter listened with concern and said, "I think I understand the situation you have and I will fix it. Show me the nails and the post-hole digger and i'll be able to do a job that please you. The older brother had to go to town so he helped the carpenter get the materials ready and then he was off for the day. It was morning and the carpenter had all day and he work hard sawing, nailing and measuring. About sunset the older brother returned and the carpenter had just finished his job. The farmer eye's opened wide, his jaw dropped. There was no fence there at all. It was a bridge, a bridge stretching from one side of the now deeper creek to the other. A fine peace of work, hand rails and all. While he was standing on the new bridge still wondering whether to get mad at the carpenter for not following his wishes, he looked up and there was his brother coming across the other side with his hand out stretched. You are quite a fellow to build this bridge between us after all I have said and done, can you forgive me. Let this day pass with thanksgiving that we have admitted our wrongs and ask forgiveness of one another to live in peace and love as brothers should. As they were embracing and rejoicing to one another, they looked around to see that the carpenter had gone but left a peace of paper laying on the ground right in front of the entrance to the bridge. The brothers walked over to see what it was and it said, "This bridge was built to make amends between the two of you. You owe me nothing, it was a pleasure and I would love to stay and chat with you but I have many more bridges to build and more lives to repair. Please remember that I am always here for you now and always.............Jesus Lo I will be with you always, even till the end of the world. Jesus will repair our broken addicted lives if we will lay it at his in honesty. This is a lesson in life that there are many out there like this that need some kind of repairing. Pride and arrogance will hold you back and destroy the lives of friends and families. This is just what Satan is looking for division among us. He knows as long as there is division that love will fade away and if love fades away he has conquered a life away from God. Small words or deeds can cause a lifetime of guilt deep down inside for what we should have done and didn't because pride took over. Just as this story is written, ask yourself this, "Where would these two brothers have been in life if it wasn't for Jesus building that bridge between them. More than likely they would lived until life ceased without being forgiven for they deeds. Jesus if you can't find it in your heart to forgive thy brother there will be no forgiveness for you. Think about it.

4 Tips to Deal with Frustrating People By Judith Orloff. M.D. “Have patience with all things, but chiefly have patience with yourself.” ~ Saint Francis De Sales Every day there are plenty of good reasons to be frustrated. Another long line. Telemarketers. A goal isn’t materializing “fast enough.” People don’t do what they’re supposed to. Rejection. Disappointment. How to deal with it all? You can drive yourself crazy, behave irritably, feel victimized, or try to force an outcome–all self-defeating reactions that alienate others and bring out the worst in them. Or, you can learn to transform your frustration with patience. ... Read More Link On Right As a psychiatrist, I help others see that patience doesn’t mean passivity or resignation, but power. It’s an emotionally freeing practice of waiting, watching, and knowing when to act. To many people, when you say, “Have patience,” it feels unreasonable and inhibiting, an unfair stalling of goals. In contrast, I’m presenting patience as a form of compassion, a way to regain your center in a world filled with frustration. I n “Emotional Freedom,” I discuss how to transform frustration with patience. To tame frustration, begin by evaluating its present role in your life, how much it limits your capacity to be happy. The following quiz will let you know where you are now so you can grow freer by developing patience. Frustration Quiz: How Frustrated Am I? To determine your success at coping with this emotion, ask yourself: Am I often frustrated and irritable? Do I typically respond to frustration by snapping at or blaming others? Do I self-medicate letdowns with junk food, drugs or alcohol? Do my reactions hurt other people’s feelings? When the frustration has passed, do I usually feel misunderstood? During a hard day at work, do I tend to lose my cool? When I’m disappointed, do I often feel unworthy or like giving up? Answering “yes” to 5-7 questions indicates an extremely high level of frustration. 3-5 “yeses” indicates a high level. 2 “yeses” indicates a moderate level. 1 “yes” indicates a low level. Zero “yeses” suggests you’re dealing successfully with this emotion. Even if your frustrations are off the charts, patience is the cure. In today’s world there are plenty of opportunities to cultivate this invaluable skill. Life teaches patience if you let it. 4 Ways to Communicate with Patience (from “Emotional Freedom”) When someone frustrates you, always take a breath first before you react. Decide if you want to talk now or wait to calm down. If you’re highly reactive and upset, have the discussion later when you’re calmer then you’ll be more persuasive and less threatening. At that time use this approach: Tip #1. Focus on a specific issue–don’t escalate or mount a personal attack. For instance, “I feel frustrated when you promise to do something but there isn’t follow-through.” No resorting to threats or insults. In an even, non-blaming tone, lead with how the behavior makes you feel rather than how you think the other person is wrong. Tip #2. Listen non-defensively without reacting or interrupting. It’s a sign of respect to hear a person’s point of view, even if you disagree. Avoid an aggressive tone or body language. Try not to squirm with discomfort or to judge. Tip #3. Intuit the feelings behind the words When you can appreciate someone’s motivation, it’s easier to be patient. Try to sense if this person is frightened, insecure, up against a negative part of themselves they’ve never confronted. If so, realize this can be painful. See what change they’re open to. Tip #4. Respond with clarity and compassion this attitude takes others off the defensive so they’re more comfortable admitting their part in causing frustration. Describe everything in terms of remedies to a specific task, rather than generalizing. State your needs. For instance, “I’d really appreciate you not shouting at me even if I disappoint you.” If the person is willing to try, show how pleased you are. Validate their efforts: “Thanks for not yelling at me. I really value your understanding.” See if the behavior improves. If not, you may have to minimize contact and/or expectations. In communication, patience is a powerful emotional currency. As you’re more able to tolerate the discomfort of frustration and not blow it by acting out, your relationships will function on a higher level. In any interchange, always define what you’re after. Is it to resolve a specific frustrating behavior? To say “no” to participating in a dead-end pattern? Or is it to simply convey your feelings without expectation of change? Even if the frustration is irresolvable, patience sets the right tone to treat others and yourself respectfully. Judith Orloff MD is the author of the New York Times bestseller Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself From Negative Emotions and Tra…(Three Rivers Press, 2011) now available in paperback and upon which this teleclass is based. Her work has been featured on The Today Show, CNN, the Oprah Magazine and USA Today. Dr. Orloff synthesizes the pearls of traditional medicine with cutting edge knowledge of intuition and energy medicine. An Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at UCLA, she passionately believes that the future of medicine involves integrating all this wisdom to achieve emotional freedom and total wellness.

The Emotional Vampire Survival Guide Emotional Freedom in Action By Judith Orloff, MD To be emotionally free you can’t remain naïve about relationships. Some people are positive and mood elevating. Others can suck optimism and serenity right out of you. Vampires do more than drain your physical energy. The super-malignant ones can make you believe you’re an unworthy, unlovable wretch who doesn’t deserve better. The subtler species inflict damage by making smaller digs which can make you feel bad about yourself—for instance, “Dear, I see you’ve put on a few pounds” or “You’re overly sensitive!” Suddenly they’ve thrown you emotionally off-center you by prodding areas of shaky self-worth. The concept struck such a collective chord in my book Positive Energy that in Emotional Freedom I illustrate how it applies to protecting your emotions and not absorbing other people’s negativity. In the book I discuss these vampires to watch for and ways to deal with them. SIGNS THAT YOU’VE ENCOUNTERED AN EMOTIONAL VAMPIRE (from “Emotional Freedom” by Judith Orloff MD) • Your eyelids are heavy—you’re ready for a nap • Your mood takes a nosedive • You want to binge on carbs or comfort foods • You feel anxious, depressed, or negative • You feel put down, sniped at, or slimed TYPES OF EMOTIONAL VAMPIRES Vampire #1: The Narcissist Their motto is “Me first.” Everything is all about them. They have a grandiose sense of self-importance and entitlement, hog attention, and crave admiration. They’re dangerous because they lack empathy and have a limited capacity for unconditional love. If you don’t do things their way, they become punishing, withholding, or cold. How to Protect Your Emotions: Keep your expectations realistic. These are emotionally limited people. Try not to fall in love with one or expect them to be selfless or love without strings attached. Never make your self-worth dependent on them or confide your deepest feelings to someone who won’t cherish them. To successfully communicate, the hard truth is that you must show how something will be to their benefit. Though it’s better not to have to contend with this tedious ego stroking, if the relationship is unavoidable use the above strategies to achieved desired results. Vampire #2: The Victim These vampires grate on you with their “poor-me’ attitude and are allergic to taking responsibility for their actions. The world is always against them, the reason for their unhappiness. When you offer a solution to their problems they always say, “Yes, but.” You might end up screening your calls or purposely avoid them. As a friend, you may want to help but their tales of woe overwhelm you. How to Protect Your Emotions: Set kind but firm limits. Listen briefly and tell a friend or relative, “I love you but I can only listen for a few minutes unless you want to discuss solutions. Then I’d be thrilled to brainstorm with you.” With a coworker, listen briefly, sympathize by saying, “I’ll keep good thought for things to work out. Then say, I hope you understand, but I’m on deadline and must go back to work. Then use “this isn’t a good time” body language such as crossing your arms and breaking eye contact to help set these healthy limits. Vampire #3: The Controller These people obsessively try to control you and dictate what you’re supposed to be and feel. They have an opinion about everything. They’ll control you by invalidating your emotions if they don’t fit into their rulebook. They often start sentences with “You know what you need?” and then proceed to tell you. You end up feeling dominated, demeaned, or put down. How to Protect Your Emotions: The secret to success is never try and control a controller. Be healthily assertive, but don’t tell them what to do. You can say, “I value your advice but really need to work through this myself.” Be confident but don’t play the victim or sweat the small stuff. Focus on high priority issues rather than on putting the cap on the toothpaste. Vampire #4: The Splitter or Borderline Personality Splitters see things as either good or bad and have love/hate relationships. One minute they idealize you, the next you’re the enemy if you upset them. They have a sixth sense for knowing how to pit people against each another and will retaliate if they feel you have wronged them. They are people who are fundamentally damaged—inwardly they feel as if they don’t exist and become alive when they get angry. They’ll keep you on an emotional roller coaster and you may walk on eggshells to avoid their anger. How to Protect Your Emotions: Stay calm. Don’t react when your buttons get pushed. Splitters feed off of anger. They respond best to structure and limit setting. If one goes into a rage, tell the person, “I’m leaving until you get calmer. Then we can talk.” Refuse to take sides when he or she tries to turn you against someone else. With family members, it’s best to show a united front and not let a splitter’s venomous opinions poison your relationships. Judith Orloff MD is author of the new New York Times bestseller Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself From Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life (Harmony Books, 2009) upon which this article is based. Dr. Orloff synthesizes the pearls of traditional medicine with cutting edge knowledge of intuition and energy medicine. An Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at UCLA, she passionately believes that the future of medicine involves integrating all this wisdom to achieve emotional freedom and total wellness Personal Note -- These types of people do exist - they are not at a healthy place and while they could use some compassion - understanding and direction for healing they can be very influential in your life and make it miserable -- You may not be able to just totally walk away if they are your partner or close family so you will want to protect your own well being by educating yourself and taking the steps to survive this sort of relationship - I hope you find the information helpful <3 <3 UNEEK

The Power Of Patience By Dr. Judith Orloff Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff’s NY Times bestseller, “Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself From Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life” (Three Rivers Press, 2011) As a psychiatrist, patience is an invaluable skill that I teach all my psychotherapy clients. In my book Emotional Freedom I emphasize the importance of patience as a coping skill and how to achieve it. Frustration is not the key to any door. Patience is a lifelong spiritual practice as well as a way to find emotional freedom. We need a new bumper sticker: FRUSTRATION HAPPENS. Every morning, noon, and night there are plenty of good reasons to be impatient. Another long line. Telemarketers. A goal isn’t materializing “fast enough.” People don’t do what they’re supposed to. Rejection. Disappointment. How to deal with it all? You can drive yourself crazy, behave irritably, feel victimized, or try to force an outcome–all self-defeating reactions that alienate others and bring out the worst in them. Or, you can learn to transform frustration with patience. Patience doesn’t mean passivity or resignation, but power. It’s an emotionally freeing practice of waiting, watching, and knowing when to act. I want to give patience a twenty-first-century makeover so you’ll appreciate its worth. Patience has gotten a bad rap for the wrong reasons. To many people, when you say, “Have patience,” it feels unreasonable and inhibiting, an unfair stalling of aspirations, some Victorian hang-up or hangover. Is this what you’re thinking? Well, reconsider. I’m presenting patience as a form of compassion, a re-attuning to intuition, a way to emotionally redeem your center in a world filled with frustration. To frustrate means to obstruct or make ineffectual. Frustration is a feeling of agitation and intolerance triggered when your needs aren’t met; it’s tied to an inability to delay gratification. At our own risk, we’ve become too used to immediate results. Emails zip across the globe in seconds. Parents text messages to their kids to come in for dinner instead of yelling from a front porch. You can get the temperature in Kuala Lumpur or the Malibu Beach surf report with a click of a mouse. Despite the digital age’s marvels, it has propagated an emotional zeitgeist with a low tolerance for frustration–not just when you accidentally delete a computer file, but in terms of how you approach relationships and yourself. Without patience, you turn into your own worst taskmaster. You treat spouses and friends as disposable instead of devoting the necessary time to nurture love. But with patience, you’re able to step back and regroup instead of aggressively reacting or hastily giving up on someone who’s frustrating you. You’re able to invest meaningful time in a relationship without giving up or giving in. In fact, patience gives you the liberating breath you’ve always longed to take. Frustration prevents emotional freedom. Expressing frustrations in an effort to resolve them is healthy, but it must be done from a non-irritable, non-hostile place. If not, you’ll put others on the defensive. Wallowing in frustration leads to endless dissatisfaction, placing us at odds with life. This emotion makes us tense, kills our sense of humor. It also leads to procrastination; we put things off to avoid the annoyances involved. Conquering frustration will revive your emotional life by making it your choice how you handle daily hassles and stresses. I’m defining patience as an active state, a choice to hold tight until intuition says, “make your move.” It means waiting your turn, knowing your turn will come. Once you’ve gone all out toward a goal, it entails trusting the flow, knowing when to let the soup boil. With patience, you’re able to delay gratification, but doing so will make sense and feel right. Why? Intuition intelligently informs patience. It’ll convey when to have it and if something is worth working on or waiting for. As a psychiatrist, I’m besotted with patience because it’s intimately intuitive, all about perfect timing, the key to making breakthroughs with patients. I can have the sharpest intuitions or psychological insights, but if I don’t share them at the right moment, they can do damage or else go in one ear and out the other. With regard to this, I strive for enormous patience; anything less would impede healing. I’m also struck by the fact that every world religion sees patience as a way to know God, an incentive for me to practice it, and perhaps you too. Whereas frustration focuses on externals, patience is a drawing inward towards a greater wisdom. Lastly, patience doesn’t make you a doormat or unable to set boundaries with people. Rather, it lets you intuit the situation to get a larger, more loving view to determine right action. Patience, a gift when given or received, moves within reach when you can read someone’s deeper motives. To practice patience, try this exercise. I do it all time to turn frustration around in long lines. I advise my patients to do this too. Emotional Action Step. Practice Patience In A Long Line To turn the tables on frustration, find a long, slow-moving line to wait in. Perhaps in the grocery store, bank, post office. Or if you’re renewing your driver’s license, dare to take on the mother of all lines in the DMV. But here’s the switch: Instead of getting irritated or pushy, which taxes your system with a rush of stress hormones, take a breath. Tell yourself, “I’m going to wait peacefully and enjoy the pause.” Meanwhile, try to empathize with the overwrought cashier or government employee. Smile and say a few nice words to the other beleaguered people in line. Use the time to daydream; take a vacation from work or other obligations. Notice the stress release you feel, how your body relaxes. Lines are an excellent testing ground for patience. To strengthen this asset, I highly recommend standing in as many as possible. Practicing patience will help you dissipate stress and give you a choice about how you respond to disappointment and frustration. When you can stay calm, centered and not act rashly out of frustration, all areas of your life will improve. Judith Orloff MD is the author of the New York Times bestseller Emotional Freedom upon which this article is based and the international bestseller Second Sight. Her other books are Positive Energy and Intuitive Healing. Her work has been featured on The Today Show, CNN, the Oprah Magazine and USA Today. Dr. Orloff synthesizes the pearls of traditional medicine with cutting edge knowledge of intuition and energy medicine. An Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at UCLA, she passionately believes that the future of medicine involves integrating all this wisdom to achieve emotional freedom and total wellness.

Ten Steps to Genuine Self-Acceptance By Marcia Sirota, MD Where do genuine self-love and self-acceptance come from? We get these things by soaking up all the affirmation our parents give us when we’re little. Also, our parents model their good self-worth to us. What happens, though, if our parents didn’t give us what we needed? Are we doomed to forever feeling inadequate or unworthy if our folks were neglectful toward us or unaccepting of themselves? The good news is that a person can develop self-love at any stage of life. Like learning a language, it’s easier to do as a child but it’s absolutely possible to do as an adult, using the following ten steps: The first step is to recognize that any neglect, abuse or lack of protection you experienced as a child had nothing to do with you and everything to do with your parents’ limited capacity for giving love. If your parents mistreated you it was not an indication of your inadequacy but rather, of their failings as parents. It is a mistake to judge yourself based on their poor parenting. Too many people walk around with the incorrect assumption that they are undeserving of love, success or happiness today because they failed to please their parents. The truth is, good parents love and accept their children regardless of their behavior or attributes. In fact, everyone deserves good things in life, regardless of whether or not they had adequate parenting. The second step is to grieve the loss of what you didn’t receive as a child, and begin to give yourself all the love, care and support you needed then and still need, today. In this way, you can start letting go of your past and being there for yourself. You’ll become your own “good parent” by making some time each day to engage in supportive and affirming self-talk. Thirdly, take a good, clear look at the choices you’ve been making; forgive yourself for your mistakes and set your intention to make better choices in the future. Self-esteem isn’t about complacency or leniency toward yourself but about compassion. An attitude of laziness or irresponsibility won’t help you develop self-esteem, but striving to be a better person will. In the fourth step, you must recognize your negative self-talk. The judgments and criticisms we receive as children are internalized and become the “inner critic” whose negative messages are so familiar that often, they’re unrecognizable. You’ll need to begin identifying all the things you say to yourself that undermine your self-confidence and self-acceptance. One such way is to ask yourself, “Would I talk to anyone else like this?” When you recognize the messages of the inner critic, you can begin to contradict them, one by one. Remember, nobody needs to be perfect, and that being good enough is good enough! The fifth step is to trust yourself that you have what it takes to live your best life and to handle each challenge as it arises. Self-trust leads to confidence, and greater self-esteem. The sixth step is to face your challenges head-on. Avoiding difficulties leads to a sense of helplessness, which develops into anxiety and shame. Dealing with your challenges leads to a sense of mastery, and pride in your accomplishments. The seventh step is standing up for yourself in your relationships and letting the important people in your life know what you really need and feel. Confrontation might be scary, but it will separate out your true friends from your false ones. Improving your good relationships and walking away from the bad ones will make you feel empowered and will heighten your sense of self-worth. Being a genuine person is a necessary eighth step in developing self-worth. If you put on a persona, no-one can know or love the real you. If you are genuine, you’ll experience esteem-building love and affirmation from the people who are close to you. Self-soothing is the ninth step: You need to be able to comfort and reassure yourself when things are difficult. If you can’t do this, you’ll end up using food, alcohol or other addictions to self-soothe. These choices will create shame, whereas constructive self-soothing will build self-confidence and self-love. Being a self-centered, thoughtless or greedy person won’t enable you to feel good about yourself. On the other hand, being kind, generous and patient with others will benefit them and enable you to feel good about yourself. Being a loving and giving person is the tenth and final step in building genuine self-acceptance. Marcia Sirota MD is a psychiatrist and psychotherapist practicing in Toronto Canada. Her areas of interest include overcoming compulsive eating and other addictions, unblocking creativity and healing PTSD. She is the founder of the Ruthless Compassion Institute, which is dedicated to promoting the philosophy of Ruthless Compassion.

Don’t Fear The Haters By Marcia Sirota In my creativity and empowerment group for women the other day, we were having a very interesting discussion about the fear of criticism. It turns out that many of the participants were afraid to put their artwork out into the public space, because they didn’t feel they’d be able to tolerate the nasty criticism they might receive. Of course, this fear isn’t limited to the people who attend my workshops. The wish to avoid criticism, especially for one’s creative output, is universal. I think that there’s a way around it, though. It’s a matter of understanding who these potential critics are. There are always going to be people who just want to bash whatever we might say or do. If we take a minute to look at it, it’s clear that these are nasty, unhappy individuals who have nothing of value to offer us by way of feedback. We can recognize them for the cranks that they are and choose to discount what they’re saying to us or about us. On the other hand, most people are well-meaning. If this type of individual gives us feedback, it will be done with kindness and tact, as their intention is to assist us, not put us on the defensive. As I discussed with my group members, it’s easy to distinguish between useful and useless feedback. We can quickly recognize who are the haters, and simply ignore any feedback that sounds unnecessarily harsh, critical or humiliating. In my own case, I never would have been able to publish my first book if I hadn’t made use of the very helpful comments from the writers, editors and agents who read early drafts of the work. Fortunately, all of these individuals were motivated by the desire to help me produce better work and therefore the feedback they gave was respectful. If you’re worried about putting your art out into the world, understanding the difference between genuine constructive criticism and hateful attacks can allay your fears. You never have to be concerned about the haters out there. Their hostility reveals them for what they are: not those who are ably discerning of quality work but rather, cruel, petty people looking for who they can insult next. As soon as you realize that these critics are hateful, simply close your ears to them, and choose instead, to pay attention to feedback that’s given with kindness.

Post Made By Chacha From ****** LETS SEE IF YOU CAN READ THIS WITH OUT A TEAR COMING TO YOUR EYE Six Boys And Thirteen Hands... Each year I am hired to go to Washington, DC, with the eighth grade class from Clinton, WI, where I grew up, to videotape their trip. I greatly enjoy visiting our nation's capitol, and each year I take some special memories back with me. This fall's trip was especially memorable. On the last night of our trip, we stopped at the Iwo Jima memorial. This memorial is the largest bronze statue in the world and depicts one of the most famous photographs in history -- that of the six brave soldiers raising the American Flag at the top of a rocky hill on the island of Iwo Jima, Japan, during WW II. Over one hundred students and chaperones piled off the buses and headed toward the memorial. I noticed a solitary figure at the base of the statue, and as I got closer, he asked, 'Where are you guys from?' I told him that we were from Wisconsin. 'Hey, I'm a Cheesehead, too! Come gather around, Cheeseheads, and I will tell you a story.' It was James Bradley who just happened to be in Washington, DC, to speak at the memorial the following day. He was there that night to say good night to his dad, who had passed away. He was just about to leave when he saw the buses pull up. I videotaped him as he spoke to us, and received his permission to share what he said from my videotape. It is one thing to tour the incredible monuments filled with history in Washington, DC, but it is quite another to get the kind of insight we received that night. When all had gathered around, he reverently began to speak. (Here are his words that night.) 'My name is James Bradley, and I'm from Antigo, Wisconsin. My dad is on that statue, and I just wrote a book called 'Flags of Our Fathers' which is #5 on the New York Times Best Seller list right now. It is the story of the six boys you see behind me. 'Six boys raised the flag. The first guy putting the pole in the ground is Harlon Block. Harlon was an all-state football player. He enlisted in the Marine Corps with all the senior members of his football team. They were off to play another type of game, a game called 'War.' But it didn't turn out to be a game. Harlon, at the age of 21, died with his intestines in his hands. I don't say that to gross you out; I say that because there are people who stand in front of this statue and talk about the glory of war. You guys need to know that most of the boys in Iwo Jima were 17, 18, and 19 years old - and it was so hard that the ones who did make it home never would talk to their families about it. (He pointed to the statue.) 'You see this next guy? That's Rene Gagnon from New Hampshire. If you took Rene's helmet off at the moment this photo was taken and looked in the webbing of that helmet, you would find a photograph...a photograph of his girlfriend. Rene put that there for protection, because he was scared. He was 18 years old. It was just boys who won the battle of Iwo Jima. Boys. Not old men. 'The next guy here, the third guy in this tableau, was Sergeant Mike Strank. Mike is my hero. He was the hero of all these guys. They called him the 'old man' because he was so old. He was already 24. When Mike would motivate his boys in training camp, he didn't say, 'Let's go kill some ****' or 'Let's die for our country.' He knew he was talking to little boys. Instead he would say, 'You do what I say, and I'll get you home to your mothers.' 'The last guy on this side of the statue is Ira Hayes, a Pima Indian from Arizona .. Ira Hayes was one of them who lived to walk off Iwo Jima. He went into the White House with my dad. President Truman told him, 'You're a hero.' He told reporters, 'How can I feel like a hero when 250 of my buddies hit the island with me and only 27 of us walked off alive?' So you take your class at school, 250 of you spending a year together having fun, doing everything together. Then all 250 of you hit the beach, but only 27 of your classmates walk off alive. That was Ira Hayes. He had images of horror in his mind. Ira Hayes carried the pain home with him and eventually died dead drunk, face down, drowned in a very shallow puddle, at the age of 32 (10 years after this picture was taken). 'The next guy, going around the statue, is Franklin Sousley from Hilltop, Kentucky, a fun-lovin' hillbilly boy. His best friend, who is now 70, told me, 'Yeah, you know, we took two cows up on the porch of the Hilltop General Store. Then we strung wire across the stairs so the cows couldn't get down. Then we fed them Epsom salts. Those cows crapped all night.' Yes, he was a fun-lovin' hillbilly boy. Franklin died on Iwo Jima at the age of 19. When the telegram came to tell his mother that he was dead, it went to the Hilltop General Store. A barefoot boy ran that telegram up to his mother's farm. The neighbors could hear her scream all night and into the morning Those neighbors lived a quarter of a mile away. 'The next guy, as we continue to go around the statue, is my dad, John Bradley, from Antigo, Wisconsin, where I was raised. My dad lived to 1994, but he would never give interviews. When Walter Cronkite's producers or the New York Times would call, we were trained as little kids to say, 'No, I'm sorry, sir, my dad's not here. He is in Canada fishing. No, there is no phone there, sir. No, we don't know when he is coming back.' My dad never fished or even went to Canada. Usually, he was sitting there right at the table eating his Campbell 's soup. But we had to tell the press that he was out fishing. He didn't want to talk to the press. 'You see, like Ira Hayes, my dad didn't see himself as a hero. Everyone thinks these guys are heroes, because they are in a photo and on a monument. My dad knew better. He was a medic. John Bradley from Wisconsin was a combat caregiver. On Iwo Jima he probably held over 200 boys as they died. And when boys died on Iwo Jima, they writhed and screamed without any medication or help with the pain. 'When I was a little boy, my third-grade teacher told me that my dad was a hero. When I went home and told my dad that, he looked at me and said, 'I want you always to remember that the heroes of Iwo Jima are the guys who did not come back. Did NOT come back.' 'So that's the story about six nice young boys. Three died on Iwo Jima, and three came back as national heroes. Overall, 7,000 boys died on Iwo Jima in the worst battle in the history of the Marine Corps. My voice is giving out, so I will end here. Thank you for your time.' Suddenly, the monument wasn't just a big old piece of metal with a flag sticking out of the top. It came to life before our eyes with the heartfelt words of a son who did indeed have a father who was a hero. Maybe not a hero for the reasons most people would believe, but a hero nonetheless. We need to remember that God created this vast and glorious world for us to live in, freely, but also at great sacrifice. Let us never forget from the Revolutionary War to the current War on Terrorism and all the wars in-between that sacrifice was made for our freedom. Remember to sing praises for this great country of ours and also please pray for our troops still in murderous places around the world. Stop and thank God for being alive and being free due to someone else's sacrifice. REMINDER: Everyday that you can wake up free, it's going to be a great day. One thing I learned while on tour with my eighth grade students in DC that is not mentioned here is that if you look at the statue very closely and count the number of hands raising the flag, there are 13. When the man who made the statue was asked why there were 13, he simply said that the 13th hand was the hand of God. Great story - worth your time - worth every American's time.