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Lessons from a Grandfather


Heavyduty053
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               A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law and four year old grandson. The old man had done reached the age where his hands trembled, his eyesight was failing and blurred and each step he took faltered. The family ate together at the table every night and they watched him get worse and worse spilling food. His shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult and he also knew this because he still had a good mind. Pea's rolled off his spoon and food rained down on the floor. He tried his best but couldn't help it. When he grasped a glass, his shaky hands spilled the milk over and over on the tablecloth. The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess they had to clean up after each meal.

               So they came up with the idea of setting a small table in the corner. THe granfather ate alone, while the rest of the family enjoyed their dinners and conversations. Since grandfather had broken several dishes he was made to eat out a wooden bowl. When  then family galnced in his direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eyes. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions, when he dropped a fork or spilled food. His four year old grandson watched all of this in silence.

               One evening, before supper, the father noticed his son playing with his lego's and wooden blocks, playing like he was hammering them together. He asked his son ever so sweetly, "What are you building?. Just as sweetly his son responded, "Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when you get old as grandpa". THe four year old smiled and went back to work.

Those words stung and struck the father  deep down inside and he went and told his wife what their son had said. Tears were streaming down both their cheeks realizing what they had done. That evening, the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table and for the reminder of his days, Grandpa ate with the family at the family table. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.

 

Children are sometimes remarkably perceptive. Sometimes the innocense of a child is the example that God would set before us. The wise parent realizes that every day the building blocks are being laid for that child's future......and it is our task to show them the right way because we will be held accountable if we don't.

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Thanks for the story.

My F-i-L had Parkinson's. He passed last year before it got real bad. We also noticed how he

spilled food and talked very slow. We fortunately did not treat him as the story. He was blessed(in my opinion)

to have gone to the Lord before it got worse. He is in a better place and the Good Lord helped relieve the stress

from us of not having to deal with his frustration of the disease. 

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Experiencing these actions with my sweet dear mother who is going through dementia.  We include her in everything she is able to do, our conversations are off, best advise I can give is, go with the flow, and laugh with them more often than ever. As long as she can interact with us, she will be treated as royalty, respect and a lot, a lot of patience and love. She is struggling for words, her mobility is slowing down more so than we would like, all part of the illness.  All we can do is try and be prepared for the next stage, just so she can be as comfortable as possible.  Soon she will no longer be with us, but will still be with us.  They say this is the longest goodbye, I have to agree, a bitter sweet goodbye.

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