possum Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 I heard noises and sounds last night so Possum laid his drink down and crawled to his back door. When I opened the door a possum was sitting there on its haunches and grinning at me. He then said to tell his believers that it's done and they will know it before 6 am est tomorrow. I fell prostrate before the possum and when I raised my head the voice/possum was gone. People, it is time to Parttyyyy!!! Quit your jobs now and pour it out on the bosses desk and head for the beverage store, do it now!!! 11 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigJake Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 I have a story very similar. I was out back in my Tiki having a rum and coke or 7 and after a while the wind picked up. Suddenly I noticed the Palm fronds were taping morse code on my houses down spouts. Being an ex tenderfoot scout I read the message and it said never believe a talking possum. 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shabibilicious Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 I don't recommend drinking with prostrate issues. GO RV, then BV 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chess Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 "......noises and sounds last night.........." Probably just a bad case of gas!!....................................... (you and your imaginary critter!) 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DinarDavo Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 (edited) At least it's not second hand intel. ....straight from the possum's mouth. Edited March 23, 2015 by DinarDavo 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bunk Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 Go back to hibernation... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrparrot Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 Ok, this is too freaky. Last night, I arrived at the yard. The security lights were out. I heard a noise by the inner gate. I shined my flashlight. There, in the glow of the flashlight, was a raccoon, sitting in the fence. I looked at him. He looked at me, and then spoke to me. He said, and I quote... Gather ye rose-buds while ye may,Old Time’s bones are a-aching;And this same ’possum that grins today,Tomorrow won’t be faking. And then he vanished into the darkness. So it seems that Possum just might be on to something this time, since the other creatures of the night are now delivering messages of hope... 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DinarThug Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 Do These 'Voices' Ur Always Hearing Involve A 1-800 Number And Ur Credit Card ... 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrparrot Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 I called one of those "intimate calls" numbers, years ago, just to see what it was like. Ended up catching an ear infection... 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SgtFuryUSCZ Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 (edited) ***/// POSSUM..! You ol' snaggled-toothed, twisted tailed varmint ! You're like those fat 'ol Manatees out behind BigJake's hut up yonder on The Crystal River that lure drunken Sailors to their deaths.... Quit tellin' folks to up n' quit their jobs until you've already exchanged yours. You're not a possum... you're a Guinea Pig. Our big, fat Lab Rat. Once you've survived the lines at WellsFargo and don't have a Deenar left in yer pocket, then, and ONLY THEN may you tell the rest of us Lemmings to jump off the cliff ! Now git yer stanky Marsupial carcass back behind The ol' Woodshed n' stay there ! Edited March 23, 2015 by SgtFuryUSCZ 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiljor Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 ***/// POSSUM..! You ol' snaggled-toothed, twisted tailed varmint ! You're like those fat 'ol Manatees out behind BigJake's hut up yonder on The Crystal River that lure drunken Sailors to their deaths.... Quit tellin' folks to up n' quit their jobs until you've already exchanged yours. You're not a possum... you're a Guinea Pig. Our big, fat Lab Rat. Once you've survived the lines at WellsFargo and don't have a Deenar left in yer pocket, then, and ONLY THEN may you tell the rest of us Lemmings to jump off the cliff ! Now git yer stanky Marsupial carcass back behind The ol' Woodshed n' stay there ! Hahahahahahaha, now that was funny :-) thanks for the laugh SGT, made my day. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DWitte Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 WOW Ladies. I like that. Anybody around here got a job? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boosterbglee Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 Fury Ladies....get after that ol' varmint!!! I like it! Possum needs to pick his prostate up off the floor ...that's nasty! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Artitech Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 Alright, going to Bosses office NOW! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScooterScum Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 Drinking with prostrate issues isn't so bad but, drinking with prostate issues is. LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
umbertino Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 I don't recommend drinking with prostrate issues. GO RV, then BV lol At least it's not second hand intel. ....straight from the possum's mouth. Emphasis on "mouth" Go back to hibernation... He and Momma, right? I called one of those "intimate calls" numbers, years ago, just to see what it was like. Ended up catching an ear infection... lol Alright, going to Bosses office NOW! And tell him loud and clear where to get off...... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jar41 Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 i think you all have had to much to drink...haha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moose 57 Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 (edited) Ok, this is too freaky. Last night, I arrived at the yard. The security lights were out. I heard a noise by the inner gate. I shined my flashlight. There, in the glow of the flashlight, was a raccoon, sitting in the fence. I looked at him. He looked at me, and then spoke to me. He said, and I quote... Gather ye rose-buds while ye may, Old Time’s bones are a-aching; And this same ’possum that grins today, Tomorrow won’t be faking. And then he vanished into the darkness. So it seems that Possum just might be on to something this time, since the other creatures of the night are now delivering messages of hope... I want what you & possum are smoking! or did you meet Alice! lol Edited March 23, 2015 by moose 57 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
umbertino Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 i think you all have had to much to drink...haha I only drink water but that's enough to get me high already Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nannab Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 HUH?????This would start me drinking. Go back to sleep little possem. NIght Night Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gymrat76541 Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 Oh it's a sad day in dinar land when they poke fun at the all mighty POSSUM! Possum - I believe ya my friend! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
one2one Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 somebody knocked on my door last night tap-tap-tap---pause tap-tap equals $ 3.20 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skeetdog Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 .....''What''... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrparrot Posted March 23, 2015 Report Share Posted March 23, 2015 somebody knocked on my door last night tap-tap-tap---pause tap-tap equals $ 3.20 That was the neighbor in 6B. He was using Morse Code. He was trying to tap out $4.20... He was stoned, and looking to score, but forgot one tap. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bob Posted March 24, 2015 Report Share Posted March 24, 2015 "...............................Possum is a result of copulation between Janet Reno and Freddie Mercury!" "Stay thirsty my friends!" 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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